I’m not the kind of ‘trendy’ bipolar, although my cunt of an aunt believes I have ‘convinced’ myself of that, despite being to the nuthouse twice (50 days total) and several psycho-shinks having diagnosed me with several other mental disorders; the very first nuttyness I got diagnosed with was of course, ADD/ADHD. I was given Ritalin. I still take Ritalin though, 2 kinds of it (36mg extended release and 20mg regular type),

So given that I have had a natural birth, the flow of oxygen could have been cut off to my brain. So could I also be ‘on the spectrum’ as they say?

I am not a healthy person. I am very obsessive with shit nobody cares about. But that’s the funhouse version of ‘autism’ that media shows. Plus it could be from Ritalin use.

How do I know that I am ‘on the spectrum’ without relying much on any external sources? Is it like bipolarity where they give you pills? What does exactly happen when you are known to be an autistic person?

Is it even necessary if I get diagnosed? I already know my brain is not right. So what’s the use in getting the double.

But honestly I have some obsessions that could signal a bit of on-the-spectrum-y-ness? Like why do I hate Rust and all Rust programmers?

I don’t do well socially either. Again I realize these are ‘funhouse’ and ‘stereotypical’ things people say about people on ‘the spctrum’. But I get annoyed even if people use the apostrophe ’ incorrectly!

I could just be an obsessive asshole. I am also a druggie but that’s a whole other story.

My family is chockful of bipolar people btw, but not many autistic people. My second cousin, son of my first cousin once removed, is autistic. As I understand chief reason for this is your mom and dad being old. Like my first cousin once removed was 40 when she had her son, her husband was in his 40s too.

On the other hand, my mom was 21 when she had me, and my dad 26. It’s a known fact that the younger humans are, the healthier you are. I am not trying to troll anybody, this is just a fact. Two things ruins chances of a healthy off-spring, one is consanguineous relations, the other is age. I live in one of those retarded countries where it’s still not proven to people that fucking your cousin is bad actually. My parents were from different cities, different races even. My dad was brown-skinned and green-eyed, my mom is white-skinned and brown-haired. Both are ethnically Persian though. Although my dad’s grandmother was a gypsy, these gypsies are not the ones you find in Romania, these are the gypsies who stayed behind closer to the place of origin. We call them ‘jatts’; and that’s how anthropologists know gypsies come from India (if people close to India call them ‘jatt’, and there’s a group of people in India called ‘jatt’ then, put two and two together I guess! You are smart, your parents weren’t brother and sister, or were they?)

Thanks for your help.

  • constantokra
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    6 months ago

    As to why it might be relevant at 31, according to my psychiatrist drugs may affect autistic brains differently, so that is probably relevant if you’re on psychiatric drugs. Also, symptoms may need to be interpreted differently. So if you’re basically fine then it’s probably not a big deal, but if you’re looking for improvement and you can’t seem to get it you might find out the reason, and hopefully a path to get some better results.

    FYI it’s not black and white. You don’t necessarily need to go through the formal diagnosis. If you see someone familiar with working with autistic adults, they may feel confident just meeting with you a couple times.

    Autism is written about in medical terms exceedingly differently from how autistic people would explain the experience of being autistic. My best advice for you is to look up autistic adults online. Read and watch them and see if it just clicks that these are your people. We’re all different, but if you find a few autistic people that just click you might want to check into it more.