I used to regularly get good sleep for a while pre-pandemic, but ever since then my sleep has become so dysregulated and I’ve basically become dependent on weed to fall asleep. It’s gotten to the point where I get nerve pain and restless legs (that in itself contributes to insomnia) if I don’t get high before bed, no idea if this is a shared experience with other NDers. On top of the fact that this makes weed less fun and it makes my tolerance out of control, I also don’t like relying on a substance to fall asleep as it seems to just make it more difficult to try and go without the longer I continue this pattern. I am trying to refrain from using weed to fall asleep for the next short little while but the first night I’m unable to fall asleep at all. Anyone have any advice or experience with a similar situation or just for regulating sleep in general? I know sleep difficulties are part and parcel of the autistic, ADHD, ND experience generally. I can’t function if I don’t get good sleep and I’m desperate.

  • ihaveibs [he/him]OPEnglish
    6•5 months ago

    Can’t reply to all the comments so I’ll just respond here. I truly appreciate the advice everyone is giving me!

    I guess I was hoping there was some secret easy fix or something but I guess the truth is I’m gonna have to put some hard intentional work into addressing the issue. I think I’m still in the midst of a 3+ year long burnout that I need to address as well to figure out my sleep issues. I will try slowly weaning off weed instead of quitting cold turkey so that I can still get sleep and don’t dysregulate myself even more. I’ll start introducing some better sleep hygiene, turning off screens, going to bed at a consistent time etc. and trying some melatonin. I definitely need to be better about my diet and physical shape as well. Unfortunately the extended daylight hours during the summer do not help so I will also try to find ways to simulate night time earlier to help as well.

    Thanks for giving me a space to talk about this stuff and get suggestions. I’ve been so heavily masking for so long that I think I’m genuinely learning for the first time what it means to take care of myself.

    • NoLeftLeftWhereILive [none/use name, she/her]English
      3•5 months ago

      You’ll get there. meow-hug

      For what it’s worth I have only ever done the stuff I posted about, I still drink my coffee (has never made me wired), still have my night owl rhythm at weekends and all that, I stay on my screens until I go to sleep. I think I mostly just accepted I am wired different like this and love nights and just leaned into the few things that helps me spesifically to do what I must to survive this wage labor hell. But I don’t like it that I have to do this. Figuring out the low dose melatonin took 3 years and I don’t take it on weekends because I allow myself to be myself for these two nights a week. So mostly I am trying not to stress about making my sleep perfect or hygienic or whatever.

      This is my complicated way of saying I hope you are kind to yourself and embrace the way you are just as you are. There’s a reason neurodiverse folks like us can be called and become perfect neoliberal subjects and all of these ways we try to “fix ourselves to fit in” can in themselves turn into a bit of a burnout inducing mask/performance. At the end of the day we are probably never going to have an easy time with sleep in the neurotypical sense of “easy” if we have to do it on their terms, because there are no habits.