Sorry this isn’t really a question
She doesn’t listen when i tell her how i want to be treated. I don’t owe her an explanation about why it hurts. It should be enough to say “this hurts me”. She never, ever changes her behavior no matter what i say. It’s always my fault when i get hurt.
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Locking as it’s not a question. Sorry you’re going through that OP but there are other communities to get support.