Wish granted, a finger curls on the monkey’s paw. As the Turkish diaspora has a presence in every country the U.S. gets rye from, this particular rye must have been grown elsewhere. India has a somewhat suitable climate, a negligible (modern) Turkish population, but no current rye industry. In order for this rye to have reached you from there, the past was altered such that rye started catching on in India 60 years ago, just enough time for a burgeoning niche crop market to have developed by now. Rye grown in India is now preferred in some of the fancier U.S. deli sandwiches, like yours. It’s said to have a more complex flavor profile.

Unfortunately, due to the variety of weed species present and the climate favorable to them, weeding rye fields in India is a bit of a nightmare. GEAC (the Genetic Engineering Appraisal Committee) authorized the exploration of genetically modified rye in the 90s, to develop more productive and herbicide-resistant strains of the crop. In a turn nobody could possibly have ever predicted, however, the modified rye became much too hardy. It could out-compete nearly any other plant. Having only been introduced in 2008, by 2020 the spread was rampant enough to cause international alarm. Entire ecosystems had collapsed. Today, global environmental devastation from rye overgrowth is a real possibility.

Fortunately, there are so many looming apocalypses that the news in your area has barely covered this one. You have no idea any of this is happening. Even if you did, as soon as you made your wish, circumstances became such that this had always been the case. No surprises there. The imaginary audience watches on as you take a bite of your delicious sandwich and smile, the end credits start rolling, the outro theme plays.