🤔 IMO they aren’t forbidden, just off-topic. Most of the time they are allegations. Allegations are just that, allegations. Until a court has decided whether they are true or not, they should be taken as just that, allegations. It is undeniable that rape and assault allegations have more impact than most allegations.
If a court verdict were shared, then it would be much more substantial, but even then, to most people, they are of little impact. What do I care if some person I don’t know is convicted or not convicted of a crime? It’s hard enough to remember the names of all my cousins, let alone some stranger on the web.
What do I care if some person I don’t know is convicted or not convicted of a crime?
That one is totally up to you. What you should care about is whether innocent people are suffering because or your action or inaction.
The article talks about rape specifically, but many forms of abuse exist in communities, both online and offline. Only a fraction of them are prosecuted, but many of them cause real harm nonetheless.
The thing is, you don’t have to remember the people or their stories, all you need to remeber is what is right and what is wrong, or what qualifies as a bad actor vsa good one, and then speak out in support of the good ones. So just two things to remember, way fewer than you have cousins I assume.
If we have insufficient information, how do we know that innocent people are actually being harmed, or if we do take action (the minimum action you seem to be advocating for is ostracism) against the accused how do we know that they are not the innocent ones?
Are we really supposed to resort to broad statistics when making intimate decisions?
“Ostracizing” the accuser is generally voluntary. There is a difference between “I’m not comfortable working with this person” and leaving, and everyone coming to you and saying “Get out”.
The latter is fairly rare to happen to accusers, but it’s expected for the accused.
The latter is fairly rare to happen to accusers, but it’s expected for the accused.
That’s not true. Kids have been disowned by their families for reporting SA. Ostracization is a real possibility for victims and it’s a very large part of causes rapes to go unreported. Nobody wants to be friends with the person who makes false allegations.
Not to mention you’re leaving out all the people who will see someone actually convicted and decide not to ostracize the guilty person because “akchually he’s a good guy”.
The reality is that it is insanely hard to fence-sit on “I don’t believe the accusation but I don’t think the accuser is lying either”.
But we are talking about a professional community, most people in this community that the post is about aren’t friends and likely don’t interact with each other outside of the work they do.
This is confusing. Maybe OP has a point that we should just be forthright about whats going on so people can make informed decisions.
My initial reaction is that you shouldn’t be sticking your neck out for people you only know in a professional sense.
My second reaction is that as a community if you receive reports of sexual assault and do not act on them in some way you are sending a message that your community is not a safe space for people who have been sexually assaulted.
And I’m still hung up on how you are able to ostracize the accused and not the accuser? Is the accusation coming from outside the community?
🤔 IMO they aren’t forbidden, just off-topic. Most of the time they are allegations. Allegations are just that, allegations. Until a court has decided whether they are true or not, they should be taken as just that, allegations. It is undeniable that rape and assault allegations have more impact than most allegations.
If a court verdict were shared, then it would be much more substantial, but even then, to most people, they are of little impact. What do I care if some person I don’t know is convicted or not convicted of a crime? It’s hard enough to remember the names of all my cousins, let alone some stranger on the web.
That one is totally up to you. What you should care about is whether innocent people are suffering because or your action or inaction.
The article talks about rape specifically, but many forms of abuse exist in communities, both online and offline. Only a fraction of them are prosecuted, but many of them cause real harm nonetheless.
The thing is, you don’t have to remember the people or their stories, all you need to remeber is what is right and what is wrong, or what qualifies as a bad actor vsa good one, and then speak out in support of the good ones. So just two things to remember, way fewer than you have cousins I assume.
If we have insufficient information, how do we know that innocent people are actually being harmed, or if we do take action (the minimum action you seem to be advocating for is ostracism) against the accused how do we know that they are not the innocent ones?
Are we really supposed to resort to broad statistics when making intimate decisions?
Either way someone’s getting ostracized. People who don’t ostracize the accused are going to ostracize the accuser.
“Ostracizing” the accuser is generally voluntary. There is a difference between “I’m not comfortable working with this person” and leaving, and everyone coming to you and saying “Get out”.
The latter is fairly rare to happen to accusers, but it’s expected for the accused.
That’s not true. Kids have been disowned by their families for reporting SA. Ostracization is a real possibility for victims and it’s a very large part of causes rapes to go unreported. Nobody wants to be friends with the person who makes false allegations.
Not to mention you’re leaving out all the people who will see someone actually convicted and decide not to ostracize the guilty person because “akchually he’s a good guy”.
The reality is that it is insanely hard to fence-sit on “I don’t believe the accusation but I don’t think the accuser is lying either”.
But we are talking about a professional community, most people in this community that the post is about aren’t friends and likely don’t interact with each other outside of the work they do.
This is confusing. Maybe OP has a point that we should just be forthright about whats going on so people can make informed decisions.
My initial reaction is that you shouldn’t be sticking your neck out for people you only know in a professional sense.
My second reaction is that as a community if you receive reports of sexual assault and do not act on them in some way you are sending a message that your community is not a safe space for people who have been sexually assaulted.
And I’m still hung up on how you are able to ostracize the accused and not the accuser? Is the accusation coming from outside the community?