A reminder for the uncivilized savages from a very civilized gentleman with a sweet smelling asshole: WASH YOUR ASS WITH WATER. USE A BIDET OR A BUM GUN.
Why are Americans okay with shooting up schools but not ok with shooting up their own assholes?! Bum guns also don’t require reloading! You can fire as much as you want! Use Bum guns 👍.
I’m a heavy shitter, I shit alot and I shit so much my ass crack looks like caramelized fondu. When I go outside flys swarm around my ass and get stuck on my sticky ass crack. Everyone would avoid me in the local Walmart when I shop for gaming supplies (Doritos and Dr Pepper mostly). I have difficultly wiping because I can’t physically reach under there and I can’t stand up in the shower. One day my mom told me to lose weight (yeah thanks for bullying me again mom 😒) and I know I’m a little heavy at the moment because I have to use cooking oil to greese up the doorframes so I can squeeze through but that’s only because of capitalism shrinking all the rental apartments and cramming as many people in as possible. Anyway I was playing Amongus and one of my femboy friends told me about bidgets. At first I was like “huh?” and he explained that because he plays Genshin he cannot physically leave the house or bathe and he has a special toilet that cleans his butthole for him. So I ordered one off Amazon and my god it is the best thing ever, now this device shoots water up my asshole and poof! No more shit streaked stretch pants woohoo!
What a terrible day to be literate in this masterful world you have created.
That’s amazing! Btw, what’s ur femboy friend’s snap?
I’m afraid to Google this. What is a bum gun. I already have a bidet.
Oh I think my sink has one of those will have to try it out
That’s a pussy phone
Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrring!
Oh. Yeah. That makes a lot of sense.
Super soaker with a 1200 psi stream focusing attachment
If paper is good enough for wiping the shit from my hands, it’s good enough for wiping the shit from my ass.
And this is why I don’t like handshakes.
I love the name bum gun
I love bums
As a child I was to taught to use a Lota and I have never used anything else. Is that grosser than toilet paper or better?
A less elegant solution, sure. But much better than using paper for god’s sake!
I love that they took the time to replace the bottle with a TP roll and add the package of TP in the background, but couldn’t be bothered to modify the sign or product description.
Here I fixed it
I’m confused. In the description I see Snuggle and the toilet paper is Snuggle. I can’t read the more detailed description due to poor resolution.
Yeah, Lemmy is a weird place sometimes, and people can be brainless with upvoting.
Literal shit post.
WHY IS IT 90 FUCKING DOLLARS FOR TOILET PAPER!??!?!?!
Because life happens outside USA too
Oh whew. It’s rupees.
89.95
I’d bet on it not being USD though based on the Caribbean lager behind her.
deleted by creator
Maybe it was during covid? ;)
BTW: I love how TP is answer to but cataclysm. This year they’re was extremely rare hurricane coming to Southern California and again saw a lot of carts on Costco with one or two packs of TP day before it hit.
Well, TP is the answer to butt cataclysms.
That’s a shit job.
Spread your checks and lift your sack
𝅘𝅥𝅮 send your asshole into shock 𝅘𝅥𝅮
"Honey muffle and crunches You can really taste the 3ply
Remember when TP companies lied to us and said that bigger tubes made it easier to unwind the paper, and had nothing to do at all with being able to charge the same amount for less TP?
Anyway yeah, this tube is ridiculous.
I buy TP without tubes
I am a monster
Mr Whipple is gonna be pissed
This is real shitpost
Let me know when I can trial a bidet.
you know the answer to both of those questions
