My wife and I, politically, tend to have very different viewpoints. She tends to lean conservative on a lot of things, whereas I tend to be either centrist or left leaning. It works, however, because we’re willing to calmly and rationally listen to each other’s viewpoints, and accept when the other tells us we think we’re off base or just straight up wrong.
Another important part, though, is where she doesn’t lean conservative. That being the area of human rights. She’s very accepting of trans people for instance, of which I am one. And when she has an unknowingly transphobic view, she’s always willing to listen and change her stance when it’s pointed out. If we had fudemental disagreements about treatment of LGBT people and other minorities from the beginning, I never would have dated her. That’s one line that I think shouldn’t be crossed and shows if a person is genuinely hateful or just misguided.
I don’t think she’s ever gonna fully migrate left, and I’m certainly not heading right (fell down that rabbit hole once, not gonna do it again,) but knowing she’ll listen and change if I point out a view of hers is unintentionally hateful has been a very important part of our relationship.
On the non-political side though, we tend to agree on pretty much everything. We have similar views on mental health. We have similar relationship goals. We have near identical hobbies. We even agree on the best condiment to eat nuggets with (barbecue sauce. And if you’re using ketchup you’re a monstrosity.)
Personally, I do think there’s some key things that disagreeing on will, inevitably, destroy a relationship, but I think people overestimate how much you have to agree on to have a healthy relationship.
My wife and I, politically, tend to have very different viewpoints. She tends to lean conservative on a lot of things, whereas I tend to be either centrist or left leaning. It works, however, because we’re willing to calmly and rationally listen to each other’s viewpoints, and accept when the other tells us we think we’re off base or just straight up wrong.
Another important part, though, is where she doesn’t lean conservative. That being the area of human rights. She’s very accepting of trans people for instance, of which I am one. And when she has an unknowingly transphobic view, she’s always willing to listen and change her stance when it’s pointed out. If we had fudemental disagreements about treatment of LGBT people and other minorities from the beginning, I never would have dated her. That’s one line that I think shouldn’t be crossed and shows if a person is genuinely hateful or just misguided.
I don’t think she’s ever gonna fully migrate left, and I’m certainly not heading right (fell down that rabbit hole once, not gonna do it again,) but knowing she’ll listen and change if I point out a view of hers is unintentionally hateful has been a very important part of our relationship.
On the non-political side though, we tend to agree on pretty much everything. We have similar views on mental health. We have similar relationship goals. We have near identical hobbies. We even agree on the best condiment to eat nuggets with (barbecue sauce. And if you’re using ketchup you’re a monstrosity.)
Personally, I do think there’s some key things that disagreeing on will, inevitably, destroy a relationship, but I think people overestimate how much you have to agree on to have a healthy relationship.