• whereisk@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    32
    ·
    11 months ago

    People are probably not functional adults until 23-25. But it’s harder to mold a 25yo to die in a war for you than a 18yo.

    I do agree with your general point - it takes two to tango. And a lot of the older women complaining have themselves dated across the chasm when they were younger.

    It always felt odd to me and still does though - I feel that the larger the gap the more it reveals deeper issues for both sides.

    • rekabis@lemmy.ca
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      22
      ·
      11 months ago

      What I also find deeply hypocritical is how many of these women treat a gender chasm in the first place:

      • Young woman with older man? That pervert! He’s a pedophile!!
      • Older woman with a young guy? You go, girl! Ride him like a cowgirl!

      And yes, that age gap can be identical in both examples.

      • Misconduct@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        14
        ·
        11 months ago

        And yet plenty of women also shame older women that are preying on much younger men too. That’s not making a point it’s trying to make an excuse.

        • rekabis@lemmy.ca
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          11 months ago

          plenty of women also shame older women that are preying on much younger men too

          I have never seen that happen in my entire life.

          Not. Once.

          Not saying it doesn’t happen, but it must only happen behind closed doors - without any public censure whatsoever - in ways that doesn’t happen for older men with younger women.

          Older men, in comparison, are very publicly shamed.

      • nickwitha_k (he/him)@lemmy.sdf.org
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        8
        ·
        11 months ago

        For me, it’s not the age gap so much as maturity gap and, more importantly, the power differential. When I was in my late teens and early twenties, I didn’t have my shit together in any way nor did I have a good level of maturity and self-confidence.

        The power differential between one in their 40s or 50s (hell, even 30s) and late-teens/early-twenties means that healthy relationships are the exception, not the norm.

      • AquaTofana@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        5
        ·
        11 months ago

        Bro have you seen how much Larsa Pippen has been (rightfully imo) dragged in the Bravo community for dating Marcus Jordan?!

        That shit ain’t cute in either direction!

        • rekabis@lemmy.ca
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          edit-2
          11 months ago

          Larsa Pippen

          Who?

          Bravo community

          What’s that? Some sort of spanking-new social media platform? Certainly less than 6 days old, otherwise I would have heard of it.

          Marcus Jordan

          Who?


          Edit: had to google all of these. I have no clue who any of the “Reality TV” stars are, not into basketball, and as for “Bravo”, I never even thought about TV channels as I have not watched actual broadcast TV since 2003.

          • AquaTofana@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            11 months ago

            Lmao I had to rep my Housewives because I had to leave the Bravo subreddits back on reddit and we don’t have a community here. I never pass up a chance to toss it out there in case there are other lost Housewives fans floating around Lemmy. 😅

            Anyhow, yes, Larsa Pippen was married to Scottie Pippen for years, including when he played on the Chicago Bulls with Michael Jordan (late 80s/early 90s). Marcus Jordan (Michael’s son) was already born by then. Scottie and Michael were a duo in the 90s, paired together in NBA games and whatnot, pretty much the faces of the Bulls franchise.

            Larsa Pippen is 49. Since divorcing Scottie, she’s gotten together with Marcus Jordan (33). She’s been absolutely dragged by Bravo fans due to the age difference, and because there is a nonzero chance she knew Marcus when he was in pull-ups (she denies this).

            The point I was making was, even if it’s an older woman going after a younger man, gross behavior is gross behavior. It’s not cute in either direction. We call out ladies too!

      • tjsauce@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        4
        ·
        11 months ago

        It makes me wonder why people praise Harold and Maude and vilify Manhattan, though I suppose the director of Harold and Maude didn’t marry someone Harold’s age. But most people agree that Harold walked away a better person, despite having Maude woo him and rip herself away immediately.

    • nickwitha_k (he/him)@lemmy.sdf.org
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      12
      ·
      11 months ago

      But it’s harder to mold a 25yo to die in a war for you than a 18yo.

      Yup. Between education and maturity, I became a (mostly) pacifist by 25, after fully intending to join up before I started uni.