It hurts the most when it’s your family :/
I’m 30 years old and I still have trouble saying “I want to watch this movie” when it’s just me and my husband having a movie night. Literally anything I wanted to watch or do in that house was somehow the weirdest thing anyone had ever heard of. That’s growing up in an Arkansas white-flight suburb for you.
And then they get mad that you don’t tell them what you’re up to. Either listen and don’t belittle, or be a belittler and don’t expect to hear anything.
I genuinely wish there was a license, or barring that, at least mandatory psych evaluations and training, to be a parent.
because jesus christ so many people seem to actively hate their children. You should encourage your children and hope they flourish. Not stamp them down and grind them into the concrete like an finished cigarette.
the real solution is that individuals shouldn’t be solely responsible for raising children, children should be raised collectively by at least like 5 people and ideally more like 50…
think about how kids would grow up in the past, they might not even be with their parents most of the time! Running around the village or local neighbourhood, staying at their friends’ house, buying groceries for old lady Stephens (who is effectively everyone’s grandmother) since she’s too old to walk to the store and then being treated to her homemade pastries, etc etc
humans just aren’t made to raise kids on their own, we’re made to share the responsibility so the kids can actually get all the attention they need, and they can get varied perspectives and knowledge.
It hurts the most when it’s your family :/ I’m 30 years old and I still have trouble saying “I want to watch this movie” when it’s just me and my husband having a movie night. Literally anything I wanted to watch or do in that house was somehow the weirdest thing anyone had ever heard of. That’s growing up in an Arkansas white-flight suburb for you.
I just plain don’t tell my mother anything. Every hobby is an opportunity to criticize and belittle, so why bother?
And then they get mad that you don’t tell them what you’re up to. Either listen and don’t belittle, or be a belittler and don’t expect to hear anything.
Pick one, you can’t have both.
Exactly, think: How does my mother treat me? How should I treat her?
I genuinely wish there was a license, or barring that, at least mandatory psych evaluations and training, to be a parent.
because jesus christ so many people seem to actively hate their children. You should encourage your children and hope they flourish. Not stamp them down and grind them into the concrete like an finished cigarette.
the real solution is that individuals shouldn’t be solely responsible for raising children, children should be raised collectively by at least like 5 people and ideally more like 50…
think about how kids would grow up in the past, they might not even be with their parents most of the time! Running around the village or local neighbourhood, staying at their friends’ house, buying groceries for old lady Stephens (who is effectively everyone’s grandmother) since she’s too old to walk to the store and then being treated to her homemade pastries, etc etc
humans just aren’t made to raise kids on their own, we’re made to share the responsibility so the kids can actually get all the attention they need, and they can get varied perspectives and knowledge.
There are plenty of people who have support networks and still treat their kids like shit, and/or abuse them.