• PaleRider@feddit.uk
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      1 year ago

      This is pretty much my view on people’s sexuality generally.

      I don’t care who’s doing what to who as long as everyone involved is a consenting adult.

      • givesomefucks@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        There’s a huge difference between picking up a streetwalker, going to a legal brothel, or answering a personal ad in places like Canada where it’s a grey area if it’s legal

        Like, off the street there’s probably some coercion somewhere, legal brothel it’s less likely they’re forced to do it but it might still be trafficking but there’s likely at least some form of oversight, and personal ads are a total crapshoot. It might be someone who’s selective and just making some money, it might be someone that has to accept every offer.

        When things arent 100% legal, some shady is statistically just going to happen. You can’t regulate an illegal business.

        • Interesting_Test_814@jlai.lu
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          1 year ago

          Tbh I know little about the topic and was under the (maybe wrong) impression than many sex workers are poor people that need to do it to survive. But then I guess the issue I was pointing is more about our capitalist society than about sex work

          • givesomefucks@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            The thing is we can’t know because it’s illegal in most places.

            There’s some who only take clients they’re attracted to anyways and manage to pull in a lot of money.

            There’s some that if they dont make X amount of money a night, they’ll get beat.

            Anyone that claims to know how much are in each group are pulling numbers out of their ass. And people that act like they’re all the same are usually using the services of people who are forced into it.

            Not all sex work is equal ethically.

            But generally speaking, the less legal it is, the worse they’re treated. Because they have no legal recourse if they’re mistreated

          • ParsnipWitch@feddit.de
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            1 year ago

            In Germany the majority (about 95 %) of sex workers are people from the poorest countries of EU. Because of the high demand and the amount of money you can make with brothels there is also an increase in trafficking from countries outside of the EU.

        • ParsnipWitch@feddit.de
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          1 year ago

          Regulated does not mean people weren’t pressured into it. Telling a young single mother from a poor country that most of her problems will vanish if she just works as a sex worker for a few years in Germany is legal and regulated. It’s not trafficking and not really coercion either. She will get a social security number, pay taxes, get health care, all that stuff she perhaps won’t get at home.

          What do you think she will tell you if you ask her whether she is doing the job freely and if she wants to keep the job? Of course she will say yes.

          But is it really just like any other job? The fact that sex workers in countries where it is regulated still suffer disproportionately from mental health problems, alcohol and drug abuse tells a different story.

        • blackbrook@mander.xyz
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          1 year ago

          This is an interesting analogy. I do get the sense that many waitresses and waiters hate their job, and do it because of lack of other options. However I do feel that by using their services and paying them, I’m helping them. They’ve made this choice, under a certain amount of coercion from the circumstances and system (which most of us suffer from to some degree, working because we have to), but my helping them get paid is helping them. I do find it important to be nice to them and treat them as real people, even moreso than people with whom my interaction is on a more equal footing.

          However there is nuance here in matters of degree. I think I can tell when a place treats their staff well or shittily–it tends to slow in their attitude. I prefer not to patronize a place when I get that shitty vibe.

          It’s interesting to think about how this translates to sex work. If I used such services, I would want to feel like the person I paid somewhat enjoyed her job.

        • ParsnipWitch@feddit.de
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          1 year ago

          Does waiting tables and having sex with strangers feel similar to you? These jobs aren’t comparable from a psychological standpoint. I never heard that it’s common for waiters to be substance users or have PTSD.

          • zndl972@lemmy.sdf.org
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            1 year ago

            Weirdly enough, restaurant workers are some of the highest substance users group. A Google search on this subject is quite surprising.

            • ParsnipWitch@feddit.de
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              1 year ago

              It’s not even close to sex workers which have the highest amount of substance abuse among all professions.

      • spasm01@lemmy.ko4abp.com
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        1 year ago

        I suppose it depends on how desperate someone is for money. I am in an industry where client relationships are important, but more money will not make my hard no a yes

        • Interesting_Test_814@jlai.lu
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          1 year ago

          Indeed, as I clarified under another comment

          Tbh I know little about the topic and was under the (maybe wrong) impression than many sex workers are poor people that need to do it to survive. But then I guess the issue I was pointing is more about our capitalist society than about sex work

            • TheActualDevil@sffa.community
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              1 year ago

              That’s literally all work in capitalism. You use your time and body to do things for other people in exchange for money. We’re all prostitutes, only a few of us have sex for it.

          • spasm01@lemmy.ko4abp.com
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            1 year ago

            That I cannot say, and seeing as in the vast majority of the US it is illegal, all we have is supposition unfortunately

    • Amaltheamannen@lemmy.ml
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      1 year ago

      All work is exloitation, sexual work is sexual exploitation. Its not exactly consent if the other option is being homeless or starving.

      • bouh@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        That’s trie if any work, as you’re saying. But then why would it be more of a problem with sex work than with any other work?

        • ParsnipWitch@feddit.de
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          1 year ago

          Do you feel like any other work is the same as sex work? For example does flippping burgers the same to you as having to have sex with a stranger?

          • bouh@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            What it is to me is different from what it should be. Why should it be different? You sell your body ability to provide a service.

            The difference lies in the intimacy associated with sex. But then how different is it from therapy? It is physical intimacy. It is the only difference.

            There is no more strain on your body than with many physical work, less actually than construction or many other work. There is no more strain on psychology than care works like therapy or nurses. Quite less actually.

            The actual problem of sex work is exploitation: people are forced into this work, and this is extremely bad. This breaks a fundamental contract of liberalism. But it wouldn’t be as bad if it was legal and monitored.

            Thus, the problem is Christian puritanism. Sex is bad in itself in this philosophy.

            Ask yourself this question : why is a woman earning money on onlyfan a bad thing, but a man earning money surveying a beach in swimsuit is perfectly fine? Actually a woman can do this too!

            It’s not a matter of how much skin you show or even how intimate you can be, otherwise massage or therapy wouldn’t be good. It is a matter of sex and how to control it.

        • CmdrShepard
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          1 year ago

          Religion/Bible thumper made it more of a problem.