It’s tough, respect for holding on as you do.

Life’s not fair, not everyone has the mental stability that is required for a happy life. But we can hope to lessen the pain a bit.

Headspace is indeed an app, with a subscription (not sure what the free plan is, but it helped me so I didn’t care). You can also meditate yourself or with free YT videos of course, but this app worked better for me.

Take care, hope you find some relief.