I’m a bit anxious right now and my PTSD is kind of triggered right now.

I was bullied for years because of my disability. I was told they never actually liked me. They knew it was wrong to hate me for my disability, but they did and “couldn’t help it”.

They said they didn’t want to be rude and discriminate, but they couldn’t help it. This lady “Belinda” said she used to despise me and only pretended to be nice but now she likes me more but still pretends to be nice sometimes. She says she doesn’t like anyone though but pretends to because others’ perception of her will change.

Belinda is kind of narcissistic. She lacks empathy and only really cares about her image. She will bully as she pleases if it doesn’t affect her image.

I told teachers about another woman Charlotte and even would tell more people like the police if it got worse. She is creating alternate accounts to follow me and find out my information.

Belinda goes along with what Charlotte does and everyone else in the group goes along with Belinda. They’re nice, just go along and are very people-pleasing.

I cut contact with Belinda and Charlotte but since the school is going to talk to Charlotte, I’m scared I made the situation worse.

My anxiety and PTSD are triggered like I said. All they wanna do is hurt me and scare me because I’m autistic. I’m a dog to them and my opinions don’t matter.

People are so cruel. They hurt me so badly, I hate them. I’m more sad and scared than angry, though.

I’m scared that these people will hate and hurt me more, that they’ll tell everyone they know how horrible, creepy, and disgusting I am. That they’ll believe them and no one will like me. All my friends will hate me too. Hopefully not.

I know they shouldn’t hate me over a one-sided story, but still.

Why would Belinda tell me she was fake if she wanted to hurt me? Is it because she already hurt me so I would know?