All anyone needed to do was make a regular ass car with an electric motor and a decent chunk of people would be interested

For marketing… sure, because people are stupid and follow norms. ICE vechiles are built the way they are because they have to house the powerplant and keep it cool and have ample room for maintenance. EVs are free to be any shape they want, thus they should be made extremely aerodynamic for maximum efficiency. But then they’ll look “futuristic”.