• JeanValjean@piefed.socialEnglish
    41·
    23 hours ago

    My person like that died last year and I’m still not okay.

    Edit:
    I appreciate the outpouring of support here.

    Story time:

    I grew up in an abusive household. My mother had BPD, and my sibling was the golden child. I was the scapegoat.
    When things got too hot, I could just show up on my person’s couch, middle of the night, and the only question ever asked was what I wanted for breakfast.

    I’ve since moved across the country, but I ache for that sense of security again. Somewhere where I was always welcomed and never made to feel less than. Now that they’ve died, I fear I’ll never find it again.

    It’s so hard to deal with, but I need help since it’s been 14 months and I still cry near daily.

    I’ve got an appointment later this week to get some professional help, because I don’t think they’d appreciate the mess I’ve become since their passing.

    Wish me luck.

    • Cyrus Draegur@lemmy.zipEnglish
      24·
      3 days ago

      my heart aches for want of two things:

      1. that a hug could be meaningfully transmitted through the internet,

      2. that you would be willing to receive it.

      … i doubt i’m capable of being That Person, but gods help me I want to be. I want to try. I hope i’ll get to…

    • Empricorn@feddit.nlEnglish
      13·
      3 days ago

      While it’s no consolation, how happy and fulfilled would they want you to be right now? What self-care can you practice to eventually reach that?

      • JeanValjean@piefed.socialEnglish
        2·
        23 hours ago

        I’ve got an appointment later this week to talk to professional types because I’m not handling it well and I don’t think they’d like to see me in the state I currently am.

  • bizarroland@lemmy.worldEnglish
    15·
    3 days ago

    I wonder if this is the idea the witch in the Hansel and Gretel story started out with, only she made a wrong turn somewhere along the way.

      • Scubus@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
        4·
        2 days ago

        Wow, their entire profile got nuked but not deleted. What are they saying? And for a mod to have deleted all their comments, it seems the mod must be on their instance, in which case why didnt they delete the account?

        • credo@lemmy.worldEnglish
          6·
          2 days ago

          Just a bunch of LLM based responses to each semi-random post. Same format each time, 2-3 paragraphs. New account with 57 posts in 11 hours, testing the waters on how well they set it to respond is my guess. Good for building a farm with a history.