how positively I’m perceived on a given day seems to not correlate with any work done
seems to mostly depend on how I look in meetings
I have discovered that being liked is more important than doing anything. This appears to be a near universal reality, and applies to work, relationships, family, religion, politics, home renovation, economics, finance - you name it. Always be nice to your colleagues. Smile a lot. Be interested in their hobbies. Say yes to social time. This is how you get promoted. If you want to make it to the C suite, you need to put in a little effort. Not too much though. You don’t want to become too important in your role to promote.
My cousin is an extremely smart and well educated woman. She tried for 6 years everything in her power to get promoted. Worked her fucking ass off.
When she gave up, started dressing like a slut and hitting on her boss she started getting a pay bump every quarterly review and inside a year basically made more progress in her career then the previous six.
That went in for a few years till she started rounding over 30 and her ability to look like a slutty high schooler basically fell off.
Her career at that company has been dead ended since. She bitches about it frequently. And complains the fact she was “too proud to show some cleavage” when she was younger prevented her from making more money.
It’s fucking stupid, awful and really fucking frustrating. I looked up to her when I was young. So to see her basically break under the sexism of society is God damn awful.
I’m not sure which “pill” I’m about to take but I really think what you describe is less “sexism” and more “human nature.” I’ve seen attractive men and women get promoted on the basis of their attractiveness and sex appeal. It is especially prevalent in customer-facing roles. For some reason, people buy more from attractive people. They trust them more. They’re less likely to cancel contracts. They complain less. They agree more. Everyone just seems happier and more content. A slew of psychologists have a lot to say about this phenomenon so I don’t need to rehash it.
I think sexual appeal is inextricably linked to being liked, for good and bad. Some people are born on third base. Some people need to work much harder to be funny and charming.
I have discovered that being liked is more important than doing anything. This appears to be a near universal reality, and applies to work, relationships, family, religion, politics, home renovation, economics, finance - you name it. Always be nice to your colleagues. Smile a lot. Be interested in their hobbies. Say yes to social time. This is how you get promoted. If you want to make it to the C suite, you need to put in a little effort. Not too much though. You don’t want to become too important in your role to promote.
My cousin is an extremely smart and well educated woman. She tried for 6 years everything in her power to get promoted. Worked her fucking ass off.
When she gave up, started dressing like a slut and hitting on her boss she started getting a pay bump every quarterly review and inside a year basically made more progress in her career then the previous six.
That went in for a few years till she started rounding over 30 and her ability to look like a slutty high schooler basically fell off.
Her career at that company has been dead ended since. She bitches about it frequently. And complains the fact she was “too proud to show some cleavage” when she was younger prevented her from making more money.
It’s fucking stupid, awful and really fucking frustrating. I looked up to her when I was young. So to see her basically break under the sexism of society is God damn awful.
I’m not sure which “pill” I’m about to take but I really think what you describe is less “sexism” and more “human nature.” I’ve seen attractive men and women get promoted on the basis of their attractiveness and sex appeal. It is especially prevalent in customer-facing roles. For some reason, people buy more from attractive people. They trust them more. They’re less likely to cancel contracts. They complain less. They agree more. Everyone just seems happier and more content. A slew of psychologists have a lot to say about this phenomenon so I don’t need to rehash it.
I think sexual appeal is inextricably linked to being liked, for good and bad. Some people are born on third base. Some people need to work much harder to be funny and charming.
It’s because when you’re talking to a hot person your brain pumps out more happy juice.
Don’t hate the player, hate the game.
In this case, the game consists of players who choose to play it this way, without any repercussions for not playing it.
In short, “be a member of the team” and a likable enough person to get along with at work.
The recurring themes in this message suggest that’s going to be challenging.