I didn’t come out until I was 26, and it went badly.
My dad sat in judgement and was very ashamed of me. He did change his mind much later but still said “I don’t like your lifestyle”.
Mum never changed and did not like it all.
Both of them are dead now, and… I don’t particularly miss them. I feel strange reading about how other people appreciate their parents.
My partner’s mum considers me her 2nd son. She’s been so accepting of me, as has her family. Same with my cousins, who my dad decided not to tell. When I did tell them after he died, they were mostly very welcoming.
They were “supportive” but when it comes to actual support they avoid it. When I mentioned ace and aro they dismissed it saying I’ll grow out of it. Been told my whole life we will love you whoever you love and whoever you are. I’ve had two relationships in secret :/ when I came out as non-binary it was forced and wasn’t meant to happen. Don’t remember what but they misgender me because “it’s too hard” to switch between they/them at the house and she/her with extended family -_- as if I don’t do that constantly. That and actively making fun of my name. They constantly talk about how queer rights matter but won’t actually support their queer kid. I’m so ready to move out. It’s bizarre I don’t get it
I hear so many times, and have experiences it myself, where families are cool with gay and trans people right until their child comes out, and suddenly it’s not OK and they start making excuses.
It’s just… Shit. Why would they be so nasty?
I think for sure my parents comes from some part of their strongly Christian upbringing or something like that. Where queer people are fine, but then also imagining also having your kid be queer is too much? Either way still doesn’t make sense and has hurt my relationship significantly with them. Especially considering I plan on moving in with my girlfriend at some point
I wish you a swift and easy move.
Some distance might wake them up about you.
My parents were frustrated, but not boiling over when I came out as bi. I guess they thought future grandchildren weren’t out of the question yet. Then I came out as trans, and I was immediately dead to them. I’ve been reconnecting with my mom years later because she’s divorcing my dad, but I’m still being cautious about it. Life has been brighter without them around anyway.
