Hey Lemmy!

I’m a dad to a two year old boy. He’s very energetic and needs quite a bit of supervision. Other than that I couldn’t wish for a better son. I’d like to preface my actual question with saying I want to be a parent and I wouldn’t change that given the possibility.

The question is, does it get any easier? I have been stuck in a loop of wake up, take care of breakfast and other preparations, go to work, go back to parenting and maybe two hours of rest after the kid falls asleep. It feels like I don’t rest enough. I will however add that I’ve struggled with depression for the better part of a decade, I’m still pretty heavily medicated and in therapy. I’m much better than I was a few years ago, but the feeling of tiredness and lack of strength to be the best parent I can is at times getting the better of me.

I’m fully aware I put myself in this situation and I’m not sure I’d be happier with no kids. I guess I’m just looking for other people’s stories of when they were in similar situations or simply some words of encouragement.

Thanks.

  • absGeekNZ@lemmy.nzEnglish
    6·
    9 hours ago

    Yes. So much, easier.

    The big improvements in your future:

    • reliably sleeping through the night ~3 YO for my boys (biggest improvement by far)
    • reliable day time toileting, so not having to carry “the bag” everywhere
    • better appetite/impulse control, ~4 YO, not always having to have a “kid snack” on hand. So you don’t have to constantly think, when they last ate.

    Those are just a few big ones in your immediate future. There are bunch more smaller things.

    One word of advice, don’t accept “I don’t like it”, before they taste any food. The rule in our house is “is OK to not like something, but not OK to not try something”. Fussiness is learned not innate. Too many parents give in way too quickly, and I see kids who don’t eat anything but stuff they are already comfortable with.

    Another commenter said to encourage age appropriate independence. 100% agree. Example, a few weeks back on Sunday morning my 10YO comes into my room and asks to make pancakes for breakfast, answer “sure, but you have to make enough for everyone (5 of us) and any mess is your responsibly to clean up”. He got his brothers to help, 4YO getting utensils and setting the table, 7YO mixing and measuring, whilst he cooked.

    It is an adventure, that’s for sure, three are super frustrating moments (daily) but there rewards are immense.