Since I assume lots of people are flying this time of year
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Earplugs. Put them in as soon as you scan your boarding pass and are waiting in the jetway to get on the plane. Nothing that is said to you after that point will be important until you’re off the plane; and if it is, you can just take out one earplug and say “say again?” You can avoid most of the annoyance of in-flight announcements and advertisements, screaming babies, and jet engines.
Drugstores. Your destination probably has them. You don’t need to pack any toiletries that you can easily obtain in one. If you are flying to New York City, you do not need to bring toothpaste with you; they have toothpaste in New York City, and you can just buy it in the Duane Reade shop that’s a block from your hotel. They have toothpaste in San Juan and Paris too. In any tropical destination, they have sunscreen there — and the sunscreen they sell there is actually safe for the coral reefs.
Water bottles. Many major airports have stations for refilling water bottles after you clear security. You can take an empty water bottle, fill it up, and carry it on the airplane.
Masks. In the old days before COVID, nobody wore masks in airports, and lots of people got colds or flu when traveling. These days, you can wear a mask and people may think you’re weird but you are less likely to pick up random respiratory diseases. I regularly wear a standard 3M N95 mask in American airports and no longer get the sniffles every time I travel.
I disagree with the toiletries thing. It’s no panic if you forget them, but straight after a long haul flight, you want to refresh which includes brushing teeth.
If you’re flying somewhere hot, you want to apply sunscreen and get straight in the pool at your destination. It really makes it feel like the holiday is started,
Don’t forget that sunscreen can be expensive depending on your destination. Going to a family or friends house and the beach? NBD. Flying to Cancun and into a resort? That on prem sunscreen is gonna cost ya mucho dinero compared to BYO.
I agree, however, if you’re forward thinking you can drop ship stuff from Amazon to the hotel and have it waiting for you when you arrive.
The mask thing is not a joke. My cousin came to visit and the moron didn’t get the 2023 vaccination. Came over, and spend 80% of thanksgiving struggling with covid.
300 people in a crowded plane… Circulating the same air, what do you think was going to happen?
The air in an aircraft isn’t really circulated.
The engines constantly pump new air into the cabin, and at the back of the cabin there is a vent to the outside.
It still definitely spreads around.
There’s an additional reason why masks are popular in Asian countries: During flight, in-cabin air tends to get quite dry and that can easily upset your throat.
A mask reduces the humidity loss caused by the dry air exchange.
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These are stellar tips.
I would add avoid alcohol before and during the flight and noise cancelling headphones.
Also, apply for GOES or the trusted travel program. Nexus for Canadians.
https://www.cbp.gov/travel/trusted-traveler-programs
I love traveling with my Nexus card. Never have to wait in line ever.
Love it so much this straight up sounds like an advertisement
It’s $50 every 5 years. As someone who’s sat in border lines nearly 2 hours long, it was an easy buy. The eased up security in American airports is just a cherry on top.
I do sometimes feels like I’m selling Nexus cards because it’s so amazing, I want everyone to have the same experience.
I once flew into Victoria BC, Canada. Airport is really small so they don’t have a dedicated Nexus line like they do for major airports. I walked up to the guard at the front of the line and asked, ‘where’s the Nexus line?’ and he said to the crowd of people waiting, ‘wait here. I’ll be right back’ and then told me to follow him. He lead me to the front of the line like some movie star or big shot and everyone was eyeballing me like wtf is this guy. They tell people to move back to make room for me, right before the scanners and I just slink my way to the front with all eyes on me. As the guard leaves, I said, ‘I have a Nexus card… $50 for 5 years, it’s totally worth it’.
Prior to having a Nexus, I once nearly missed a flight due to airport issues, not because I was late and the stress alone was worth $50 per flight, let alone $50 for 5 damn years. Even better? Americans pay $100 USD for 5 years and we only pay $50 CAD.
Seriously, apply for one.
No matter how much experience you have as a pilot. You should always use checklists for routine operations and emergencies.
Checklists have proven time and time again to be incredibly effective.
For years, doctors refused to use them because it was an insult to their intelligence. But the results showed, and doctors still refused. Then insurance happened and surprise surprise, doctors now use checklists.
If you don’t like flying, then the best thing I can recommend to relieve the stress is that when you get where you’re going, you take off your socks and shoes and then, on the carpet, you make fists with your toes.
This turned out to be terrible advice for our hero_narrator voice
Very timely quote considering its source is a classic Christmas movie.
Interesting, haven’t heard that before but I’ll keep it in mind :) thanks!
Please don’t take me seriously. It’s a Die Hard reference. <3
Oh THAT’S why it was mildly familiar 😄
You will be in close quarters with a lot of people. People suck and will be inconsiderate fucks. Airlines are shit and have you by the balls in terms of delays and shitty service.
Go in with low expectations and don’t make yourself more miserable by getting upset about it
Great thing for everyone to keep in mind :)
Pull the stick back, houses get smaller.
Push the stick forward, houses get bigger.
wut
I think it’s about flying the plane, in the simplest form
Pull the centre stick back and you’ll go up (houses look smaller and smaller), then push for the opposite
Wear a good-fitting N95 mask from before you enter your departure airport until after you leave your destination airport. Covid sucks, flu sucks, rsv sucks - just wear a mask, ffs. And get vaccinated.
Especially in America where vaccination was a political thing. There’s still a huge chunk of Americans who get covid.
There’s still a huge chunk of Americans who get covid.
Yeah and most of them got the shots
Lol down votes don’t change the fact that everyone who got those shots still got covid
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(On Delta planes at least) The aisle armrest comes up if you press a little trigger underneath near where is meets the seat. Makes it easier to get up if you’re in the aisle seat and to exit the plane.
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If you are always hot, get a windows seat. When you’re at altitude, the side of the plane gets cold, so the window seat tends to be cooler.
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If you are on the tall side, once the fight attendant isn’t looking anymore, put your backpack or laptop bag behind your legs / knees instead of under the seat. Then you have full legroom available to stretch out.
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If the person in front of you reclines their seat back, ask the fight attendant for a pillow and a can of soda. Remove the pillow case, and put the full soda can in it. Then batter up, and bash that fucker right in the face. Just kidding. Don’t do this. Just calm down.
Having flown many times, I can confirm that the aisle armrest triggers exist on most major airlines. Any time I sit down on a flight, the first thing I do is look for that button.
The reason it’s hard to find is because they should be down most of the time. In sudden turbulence, even if you’re wearing a seatbelt, they keep you from spilling out into the aisle.
Also be aware that people walking by, the food cart, etc. can cause it to suddenly slap back down.
Yeah and then i look around to watch others try raise their own arm rests to no avail and laugh to myself
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CubbyTustard has a good list. I’ll add the following:
- Don’t fly a budget airline
- Pop a dramamine before the flight (it makes you sleepy)
- Bring gum with you on the plane (chew a piece on accent and descent to help pop your ears)
- If in the US, use the Libby app alongside your local library and download audiobooks for free to pass the time during flights
- Wear a mask on the plane (or better yet, one of those buff scarf things). Not only to protect against germs, but because if anyone farts, you’re probably not going to smell it. Plus, people kinda get intimidated by people wearing masks these days, so they probably won’t chat with you too much.
I love flying and being in the airport. Yes it can be stressful, but it’s a miracle of modern dang science that ~300 people at the same time can take to the sky. Awe-inspiring, really.
To expand: DO NOT assume that in plane WiFi will be working and download any movies, songs, etc. that you’re going to want to be enjoying!
(Our 6 hour flight to Hawaii was a SLOG because we assumed…)
I’m a paranoid flyer and I always have at least 6 movies, a dozen mobile games, and a dozen switch games, 5 audiobooks, 40 ebooks, and a paper magazine.
The thought of being bored scares me. And the one time I had a 12 hour layover, I was well prepared.
Definitely this! I loaded fun videos on micro sd cards and popped them into each of my kids’ tablets for a transatlantic flight recently. It saved my sanity big time.
Yes, airfoils and turbofans are really marvellous
While you’re in the security line, take all your shit out of your pockets and put it in your carry-on. Same for your belt.
I always took a light jacket with lots of pockets. In line, transfer all your things to the jacket and put that through the scanner. After security transfer everything back and pack the jacket.
This is a great tip, honestly. I’m always looking for ways to make the post-scanner process faster.
- do not check anything
- do not put anything in the overhead storage unless it’s a suitcase
- if you’re bringing a backpack, put it “upside down” under the seat in front of you. the floor is gross, don’t put your backpack down and then put that grossness against your back when you get off the plane
- if you’re in the back half of the plane, be ready to volunteer to move to an exit row just in case the opportunity presents itself before the plane takes off
- if you’re scared of flying, know that the plane is shaped physically to stay in the air. Why do paper planes fly? because of their shape. Real planes are shaped waaay better.
- only get water, no ice
- write down where you parked or take a picture and know how you’ll get back
- have your first meal planned when you arrive at your destination
To add to #5: safety margins are kind of nuts on airplanes. I want to say a lot of mentally deficient rednecks build airplanes, but that’s confirmation bias. Most of them are decent. Even then, safety margins, quality standards and procedures are made to account for morons and cowards that don’t want to admit they fucked up. The critical bits are done with even higher standards.
They’re safe as fuck. I’ve been in the industry for almost 20 years now and I love flying. When the plane first banks after take off and the whole airframe creaks is my favorite part, even. Fuck you nature: we fucking win.
The thousands of people across the globe that were involved in building the plane you’re getting onto are proud of what they do and genuinely care about your safety. Smile and tell gravity to suck your dick.
To add, logic unfortunately doesn’t really help illogical fears.
The fears aren’t necessarily illogical. At least, they may not be irrational. If they have incorrect information their thought process may be sound.
I also included descriptions of my emotional reactions to flight in case someone finds that useful.
AA has no better effectiveness than cold turkey, but if the venn diagram isn’t a circle AA might still have a place.
Go to your gate before you explore stores.
Carry a bottle of water. You can’t just get water whenever you need it.
Reminder that flight attendants only get paid when the airplane is in the air. It’s the stupidest thing so don’t be a asshole.
Don’t be “that person” who has to dig into their bag in the overhead compartment. Nobody likes you.
Carry a bottle of water. You can’t just get water whenever you need it.
yeah, I usually travel with a collapsible water bottle like these vapur ones
Reminder that flight attendants only get paid when the airplane is in the air. It’s the stupidest thing so don’t be a asshole.
I thought it was when the doors close their pay starts.
I travel for a living.
- Priority boarding is useless. You wait in line and have to jockey for space. I am usually one of the last people to board, I walk in, go straight to my seat and don’t have to worry about maneuvering past everyone, since they are already seated.
- Noise canceling headphones. Pick your flavor it doesn’t really matter but having a nice audio playlist or some podcasts downloaded while not being able to hear everyone else will make the flight so much easier.
- You can look up the flight before you book to figure out legroom, as a result I fly jetblue when I can and southwest when I can’t because they average about 2” and 1” more legroom respectively over everyone else.
- The smaller and the easier your carry-on is to set down, the better. The goal is for it to be able to fit under the seat and not in the overhead compartment. Overheads fill up quickly, every seat has its own storage. I personally use a small briefcase that I found at a thrift store.
- Toiletries, you don’t need as much as you think you need, and they don’t need to be in the carry-on. The only thing I would say needs to be in the carry-on is your toothbrush with some toothpaste already applied just in case. Hotels will typically have something resembling shampoo and body soap. Between those two things it will buy you enough time to get to a store if luggage gets lost.
- Luggage is best in wheels and hard cases. I went so far that I use a pelican case as my luggage case. You probably don’t need to go that hard, but if the luggage can be bent with your hand, imagine what would happen if your luggage ended up at the bottom of the pile. Nothing fragile will survive, unless it’s in a hard case. Also if you aren’t confident that your luggage can survive a trip down the stairs, you need to pack it better, luggage handlers are not known to be gentle.
- Patience. There’s a lot of hurry up and wait when traveling. Personally I bring a charger in my carry-on so I can use my laptop and phone still. You’re not going to make the plane do its plane things any faster, so just chill out, relax, you’ll get there when you get there. If you do a lot of traveling this is where the lounges come in play, but for one offs not worth it.
Priority boarding is useless
Funny you say this then talk about the overhead filling up in #4. That is the advantage of priority boarding, getting a spot in the overhead. I can’t fit more than a day or two worth of clothes in something that fits under a seat (and besides, I want the space fit my legs and feet). And not having to check a bag is huge. And it’s nice to go down the aisle without feeling like I’m constantly sticking my ass or crotch in people’s faces.
Man, I fit an entire week’s worth of clothes in the backpack I put under the seat. Granted, I bring jeans so they can be worn more than once. But I also brought my switch, DS Lite, over ear headphones, snow gloves, 2 hoodies, trimmer set, and toiletries.
Between takeoff and landing you can also move your bag out from under the seat to be behind your legs. Gives you more room to extend your legs.
Pro hack no. 1: For climate’s sake, fly only if absolutely unavoidable.
- When traveling to/from eastern Europe, always have your checked-in luggage wrapped. In those countries, especially in Hungary, there are many thieves among luggage handlers and there are many horror stories regarding in what conditions the passengers received their belongings at the end (if at all). While you cannot 100% eliminate risks, wrapped luggages are much less likely to be tampered with. It’s also worth wrapping it when you care about the outer texture of your luggage (sometimes the cargo area of the aircraft is really dirty).
- In the terminal building, find your gate first, so that you know exactly where to go when the time comes. Until then, go, find a comfortable seat somewhere else, far from the gates. At DXB I know a couple of cool locations where there aren’t many people waiting, so there are plenty of free space plus much cleaner toilets nearby due to less frequent usage. However, I’ll keep that information to myself, because I still wanna be able to enjoy those less crowded areas when I’m traveling.
- Pay attention to the safety briefing and really think it through. You have to remember it in panic situations. Pay attention to every single little detail, because everything is said for a very good reason. (Just as an example: when they say “pull the oxygen mask towards you when it appears in front of you”, you really have to yank on it (okay, maybe don’t rip it off; I have no idea how strong to pull it), because the oxygen flow starts only when a safety “pin” is released, which can be done by pulling on the oxygen line.)
- If your clothes are in your checked-in luggage, always have at least one set of extra clothes in your hand-carry.
- Pay attention to the airline’s guidelines when packing your luggage.
- During an emergency evacuation do not reach for your belongings. Just do as instructed and leave the aircraft as you’re told, ASAP. For this reason, keep your passport in your pocket and try to wear clothing that will be suitable outside as well to some extent. For example, wear your shoes and wear a sweater at least. (And pants as well, but I guess it doesn’t need to be mentioned.) You will get your belongings back at the end (if they’re salvageable, I guess).
- Others already mentioned it, but it’s so important, I need to reiterate: don’t be an asshole. It is common sense, yet there are so many people not following this rule.
- Don’t be gate lice. There is no sense standing in line when group 1 is called when you are group 5. You are slowing everyone down
- Similarly, don’t stand up the second you get to the gate. You won’t get off any faster and just slow things down.
- Keep your seat belt on at all times. When flying, you can suddenly hit turbulence. Even on the ground, accidents can happen.
- Makes sure to leave electronics and liquids in an easily accessible and take them out before going through security. Slip on shoes are also very helpful.
- Fly as early as you can. Delays tend to stack up during the day.
- Use aerolopa.com to get a better idea of actual seat layouts and positioning near bulkheads, lavatories, doors, and galleys
- Travel cards can offer great perks that make the annual fee worth it. Free checked bag, free pre-check, lounge passes, earlier boarding groups, etc.
- Even if you are checking a bag, keep a change of clothes and other essentials in your carry on. Also, back a smaller bag inside that can be a personal item in case you have to gate check your bag.
- If you lack status with the airline, you can often buy elite access that can offer shorter lines for security and check in. It also comes with even domestic first class.
- Of you are a “passenger if size” you can easily book an extra seat in Southwest by using your name with “Xs” in the middle name field. You have to check-in in person, and they will give you a card to hold your extra’s seat and let you preboard. After your flight, you can call and they will refund the extra seats fare.
