easy, the more white and bland and unhealthy: based. the more foreign and vegetabley: woke.

• if white people were eating it in the 70s, it’s okay.
• if it’s dairy, it’s okay, unless it’s like some squeaky cheese from the levant.
• if it raises your cholesterol, that’s some based epic trad food right there.
• does it have fiber in it? well that’s “sus”.
• is it seasoned with anything but pepper, salt and oregano? woke alert.
• vegetables get a pass if they’re microwaved green peas, soft crinkle cut carrots, or iceberg lettuce.
• parsley is acceptable as a garnish but you better take that off before you eat the sandwich! parsley inside a dish? like an ingredient? hamas.