I heard she wants a ewe, maybe she’s getting into sheep’s milk or something

She’s into carpentry and cabinetry, so maybe some yew would be a good gift?

Poo

Not a lot

I tried to send Mariah Carey what she said she wanted for Christmas and she filed a restraining order against me

Maybe season tickets to the San Diego Padres?

Get in touch with John Hinckley, he’s got some cool gift ideas.

Communist revolution. Worst case, she’ll give it away the very next day

Dis fuckin’ guy