I hate to say it, but I think to most people I probably look like a chud. Anyone who has known me for more than 4 seconds knows I’m not, but I’m afraid I still visibly give off that vibe. I’m a man, or think I’m probably nonbinary tbh, but I still present and appear fully masculine, close to 40, full beard and mostly just wear plain dark t-shirts with no logo and dark jeans. I do have shoulder-length long hair, but so have plenty of chuds I’ve been acquainted with. I don’t have any sense of style and have never tried to learn or care about fashion, but no disrespect to those who do.
I probably shouldn’t care, but I hate knowing that when I’m around people they probably think I’m a reddit gamer or worse. Should I try to change my appearance or should I just learn not to give shit? Does anyone else here worry about that?
I’m also going to be getting glasses in the next few days and have to decide on a frame. What should I get to try to minimize chud appearance? I have kind of a squarish face but maybe a bit rounder now as I get older. Do certain kinds of glasses scream redditor or chud? Any advice on what I should go for is welcome.
Edit- Thank you for the advice to everyone who commented I really appreciate it. I am afraid I might have given the wrong impression on some of it so to clarify, I’ll just quote one of my responses
I do want to look unassuming. I’m pretty bad with social anxiety and most of the time I just want to go unnoticed. But I worry even that in going unnoticed I’ll give off the wrong impression. Chud is an extreme I probably shouldn’t have used because I don’t think anyone would ever look at me and think gun totin’ confederate flag waving chud or wannabe cop or some shit.
The worry is looking more like the aloof redditor, new athiest or even altright leaning brand of chud, or maybe I’m using the word chud wrong. As far as the nonbinary thing, that’s a lot to get into, but just as far as dress style, I don’t really want to look masculine OR feminine. I used to wear more feminine coded things when I was younger, but these days I feel like the plainer the better. I do have some leftist t-shirts, but I save those for certain occasions or when I’m going to be around certain people, or even trying to do leftist signaling without libs knowing with my All Cats are Beautiful shirt. Most of the time all I wear is a plain dark color with NO messaging at all not even a visible logo. I guess it’s less that I want to indicate my politics and more that I don’t want to announce the wrong politics when I’m just going about my day.
To be totally honest, I posted mostly because of the glasses I’ll be getting and I don’t want frames that make me look like Vaush.
You are enough as you are now and you should be kinder to yourself.
Now for some suggestions:
Regarding glasses I suggest getting two pairs, if possible, for the purpose of redundancy. If one is broken or gets lost having a second pair will prevent it from becoming a catastrophe. One of those pairs should be fun. Fun can mean a lot of things, it can be an interesting shape or an uncommon color or something else. There are guides out there about matching face shape to lens shape but its all up to you, trust your judgement.
Accessories! 4th Reich dudes dont really go around with bracelets and necklaces, and they tend to avoid piercings. If you want to get your ears pierced its inexpensive, the aftercare is easy and the healing process is quick, plus there are a zillion options for earrings. If you’ve ever considered something more adventureous like a brow piercing or what have you, go for it! It can be a very liberating experience.
Pins are very explicitly state where you stand and what you believe in. Its extremely rare to be challenged for whatever pins youre wearing and it is very common to recieve compliments over them. I can personally attest that many trans people notice, and greatly appreciate it when people wear symbols that indicate their allyship.
I also think that you (and many others) would benefit from developing a personal sense of style. Confidence in the way one presents themselves translates into confidence in general. It’s easier than you might think, although it takes time and a little effort. I have some pointers on that if youre interested.
Addendum: yes also wearing masks is a pretty strong signal AND they serve a practical purpose. Its really nice basically never getting sick.
Big back on personal sense of style. And that can be something that other people have done if it works for you. Im certainly not doing anything new. I either look like a crust punk or a memer of the ocelot unit from mgs3 minus headgear. My standard punk look is actually even a bit different than the more modern 1000 stud count kawakami worship and more late 80s to early crust look. Less studs and band shirts more dry rotting old denim and black button ups that are missing a sleeve or whatever