I apologize if I end up posting random thoughts too often, but I don’t really have a trans girl friend group who I think are in the age bracket/headspace to provide advice on these topics.
Anywhore, I recently posted about getting hit by a truck about the universe pointing out I’ll never be pregnant, and now I’m thinking about kids and how once I was old enough to seriously consider having them, I realized I didn’t want any. My wife confessed to me that the book we both just read cemented in her mind that she does want a kid, and I’m getting kind of caught up in baby fever and I’m starting to think a major reason I didn’t want kids is because I didn’t want to be a dad. I’m still coming down from the high from my book (For Whom the Belle Tolls by Jaysea Lynn for anyone who missed my other post) where I got to explore femininity and at least the good parts of motherhood in a way wasn’t expecting, so I have to take that into account, but right now, I really want to be a mom. Anybody experience something similar post transition/have any advice for someone who’s only freaking out a lot? BTW, I am seeking therapy, the internet isn’t the place for all things mental health, but until I get in somewhere, having some support from fellow anonymous weirdos is nice to keep the brain goblins quiet. ❤️
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My kid was 11 when I came out, so I’d already gone down the path of being a parent. I always knew I wanted kids though. But the second I could drop the “dad” title, I did. Before I transitioned, I didn’t hate it, but I didn’t celebrate it or connect with it either. It was just a word. But once I started to accept myself, it got more and more uncomfortable.
Ironically, after I came out to everyone, I didn’t connect with “mum” anymore than I used to connect with “dad”. It was a better fit than dad ever was, but I never felt a strong connection to it.
These days, my kid is 20, and it’s pretty much all in the past. They call me Ada :)
