Damn, is this a subtle ad for a print subscription to The Onion?.. Because I kind of want one now.
Yeah, it is from Jan/Feb (latest) issue.

I’ve wondered how chess might play out with an optional Joker piece. Each side gets one Joker, to substitute in place of one of their Pawns. The Joker can move one square in any direction like the King, but cannot take out any pieces. No other pieces can take out the Joker either, except the opponent’s King. Also, the Joker cannot be promoted to any other piece.
The Joker is just there as a silly and annoying distraction to block opponent pieces LOL!
That’s a very cool idea.
Ah, if I may add another optional rule…
The Joker can indeed take out one opponent piece, but it’s only the opponent’s Joker.
But being that they’re Jokers and not even Pawns, they’re too stupid to fight, so it becomes a suicide move, eliminating both Jokers from the board at once…
What you think?
Coin flip: heads they both die, tails you flip a second coin and if heads, both go to the player who initiated the capture, tails they go to the other player.
Randomness is forbidden in Chess, it’s all logical gameplay.
If anything, to address this issue, I’d assign the Joker piece right in front of the King for both sides.
just use this simple formula: {sin({cos(t)*295732})*50381} where t is the time passed since the start of the game in seconds
skilled players would just calculate this in their head and plan accordingly
Do not let Batman learn of this Chess variant.
Kinda similar to a duck piece that can be placed anywhere after your turn, can’t be captured, but will move again in 1 turn.
Look at Duck Chess.
They play tournaments of it. https://www.youtube.com/live/8UOXcJRY0is?t=224s
After every move you get a second duck move where you can put the duck wherever you want to block or protect.
Well… try it out and tell us how it went?
Unfortunately, I don’t have any physical chess set to easily modify that way, but if I did, it could be as simple as taking one pawn from each side and painting a dot of red nail polish on the top, to indicate it’s an (optional) Joker piece, depending how the players care to play.
I also only know one other person in my area that used to be around to play chess with, but I haven’t seen him in a couple months.
Sigh, maybe someday…
So… Next update leak?
Search
en passantvehicular manslaughterA racecar is technologically superior to any piece represented on a classical chessboard
A racecar is a mode of transportation such as a horsey
The presented racecar is primarily one color with a sliver of the opposing color
Therefore I propose the following moveset:
-
The racecar may move horizontally or diagonally in any direction and as far as the board allows (like a queen, seeing as the most famous racecar is called McQueen)
-
In doing so the racecar can ignore/ jump over pieces in its path (like a horse, the original racecar)
-
However as it is slightly controlled by the opponent, they may change either the target rank or file by one after the player suggested their move with the racecar (as to represent the difficulties in steering racecars, where physical forces sometimes are stronger than the steering attempts of the driver)
-
how do you turn this on







