I was at a party where this very handsome guy kept making moves and initiating. It felt so nice to be chosen out of many people, and the chats were good rather than superficial small talk. After a while he asked “my place or yours?” No matter how much my mind was aware that I am not the type of person who can carelessly hook up and I get attached, my heart couldn’t say no in the moment. So we went to his and hooked up. We were also drunk which didn’t help. Full disclosure, he couldn’t get completely hard, and I wonder if it has to do with me but he said it’s probably because he’s drunk. We mutually did other intimate things too, and cuddled afterwards which got me - he was giving compliments and being sweet.

Then it got weird. I couldn’t sleep and woke him up once after which he turned over and at one point said “get out”. He was in and out of sleep with eyes closed, but it was very clearly said. He also claims that he doesn’t remember anything after he hit the bed. So does that mean it’s possible he was dreaming/sleeptalking and it wasn’t directed at me? I accidentally left something small at his place and he added me on social media later on saying he found it. We sent a few flirty messages back and forth across a few days, and he recently asked about my weekend plans but is now ghosting me for the second time.

I just feel old and stupid. I naively thought there could be something this time but they are all the same. I hate that I fell for it and couldn’t control myself. What should I do or say now? We’re in a professional organization (although not a workplace) where word travels fast, my friends all saw us and were so curious, and I really care what our peers think of me. I asked when he was drunk to keep this between us so I’m afraid it didn’t register deeply enough. Should I have a real talk with him, and if so, over food or just a talk in person or over the phone? I feel so lost. Please help me out, friends. Thank you!