Unfortunately I had to get into a struggle session this morning about whether men and masculinity are inherently cruel and misogynistic by nature.
I love this website, and I’ve seen us improve through discussion many times over the years, so I’d like to open this thread to discuss (trans)masculinity and how it fits into leftism.
As leftists, one of our core beliefs is in the ability of people and societies to improve. I think this goes hand in hand with the ability to understand and create space for positive masculinities in our communities.
Framing all masculinity as inherently oppressive and misogynistic is counterproductive for several reasons, including (but not limited to):
- Giving men an excuse to refuse to examine toxic behaviors (e.g. “I can’t help it, it’s in my nature!”)
- Making trans men and transmasculine people feel ashamed to transition and/or come out of the closet.
I’d like to share one of my favorite articles about transmasculinity. I’ve posted it on this site before, but it bears posting again: https://thenewinquiry.com/on-hating-men-and-becoming-one-anyway/
An excerpt:
Secondly, unitary theory redefined the terms of gender oppression in a way that places the ultimate blame on the bourgeoisie (a group that I, in my entry-level research job, definitely do not belong to, with none of the grey area associated with my maleness). I now understand the ways in which working-class men benefit from oppressing women as analogous to the ways in which scabs benefit from strikebreaking. The gains are undoubtedly real on an individual level but are not representative of workers’ ultimate class interest in either scenario. This allows for meaningful solidarity across gender lines.
I refuse to look at the comments for my mental health. I’ve spent my life being told my existence is wrong. I don’t need to see transphobia (that is what it is no matter how you dress it up) by fellow trans people and Communists. As a genderfluid butch I have gotten shit from everyone.
But because I know its important I want to share my experiences.
I have been beaten and physically harrased by men and women.
In high school I was chased down and attempted to force make up on me by girls.
Guys didn’t know what to do with me and I would often get harrased a lot that way. Books slammed near my head. Etc
Girls slammed my head on the side of the bus so hard it knocked my tooth out.
What I wore has constantly been made fun of. Even if I did wear girl clothes or make up it wasn’t the right kind or correct way.
Dad was constantly on my case. I was white trash for wearing the same clothes as him at home. I was to fat. Etc
I could go on. All of these experiences had to do with my egg ass being GNC.
Toxic Masculinity exists but so does Femininity. Any time you do something to adhear to the system not because you want to but because you are “supposed to” is part of it. (Of course safety is a issue that doesn’t count) There are many women out there who do things or don’t do things because they are trying go up hold this idea of white patriarchal idea of beauty. I know because they will just tell you that. “Yeah I wish I didn’t have to do this, but women have to”. Like it really sucks honestly. I’ll see my wife doing her nails or wearing a skirt and it makes me happy because it genuinely brings her joy. And she doesn’t wear make up, because she doesn’t want to. That’s awesome. That’s how it should be.
I bring this up because its not really talked about in the lens of the patriarchy. Honestly there is a lot to be discussed about the intersection of it all. Sadly we are often stuck in very rudimentary concepts.
I have had trans people look me in the face and tell me its easier for me or that masculinity in women is celebrated despite the hell I grew up with. In reality I’m accepted no where and get hate by everyone. I am not a women and I am not a man but I am and I am neither.
What is masculinity to me outside of the toxic? Its quiet contemplation. Its no mess clothes that are comfy. Bring the one to encourage my friends. Finding a balance between “strong” and "emotional’. Its feeling my anger but putting it aside. If I’m honest without knowing I’ve always saw Ashitaka from Mononoke as a role model. Its about inner strength. Comfort in existance.
I’ll end this scatter shot of points by saying this. Which I think is so important for understanding trans liberation that so many people fail to grasp.
What is good for the daisy is poison for the cactus.
Liberation for me means no make up. While make up to someone else is the most important thing. Both are true and don’t contradict each other. Life is wonderful and complicated like that.