I posted this a long time ago. Got sent Cody’s Labs list, and it was very different. He has licked so many…

The goat
Thats a lot of alkali metals to have had in your mouth. I thought they all explode/burn when in contact with water. And I am pretty sure the inside of a mouth is wet
Na: bad. Cl: bad. NaCl: amazing!
If you can get your tongue inside the machinery they use at Lawrence Livermore to create a split-second instance of some rare Earth actinide, you deserve to lick it.
Good luck finding enough Astatine to lick. It’s the rarest naturally-occurring element on earth. It’s estimated there is less than 30 grams in earth’s crust at any given time.
Did anyone ever find any?
Yes, but we still don’t know its bulk properties.
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… How exactly would you lick hydrogen? Or helium for yhsy matter…
- Fill a balloon with the gas
- Stick your tongue in the balloon sphincter
- Wiggle your tongue
- Reconsider the decisions you’ve made that led your life to this point
New fetish unlocked, but still hidden behind balloon sphincter.
Just go slow and keep it wet. It might take some time to build up your tongue strength and loosen up the opening, but I believe in you. Go forth and achieve your dreams.
Thanks for believing in me :D
Tounguepunching the gas sphincter, oh joy
- Reconsider the decisions you’ve made that led your life to this point
OR
New kink unlocked
If that moment of introspection concludes with you being happy with your path and current situation, then who am I to judge. Carry on with your ballonilingus and be happy.
Carry on with your ballonilingus and be happy.
That’s gotta be a sentence no one has ever said before.
And, dare we hope, never again
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It’s really funny, yesterday I saw a dude walk around with a T-shirt with exactly this periodic table and thought it was hilarious and now I find this
Did you lick him?
I wouldn’t advise licking calciums:
The chemistry of calcium is that of a typical heavy alkaline earth metal. For example, calcium spontaneously reacts with water more quickly than magnesium but less quickly than strontium to produce calcium hydroxide and hydrogen gas. It also reacts with the oxygen and nitrogen in air to form a mixture of calcium oxide and calcium nitride.[14] When finely divided, it spontaneously burns in air to produce the nitride. Bulk calcium is less reactive: it quickly forms a hydration coating in moist air, but below 30% relative humidity it may be stored indefinitely at room temperature.[15]
Because calcium reacts exothermically with water and acids, calcium metal coming into contact with bodily moisture results in severe corrosive irritation.[59] When swallowed, calcium metal has the same effect on the mouth, oesophagus, and stomach, and can be fatal.[46] However, long-term exposure is not known to have distinct adverse effects.[59]
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Calcium
Because of vigorous reaction of quicklime with water, quicklime causes severe irritation when inhaled or placed in contact with moist skin or eyes.
So… I should lick it fast and then hide from the effects under a table?
Lick it then chug some vinegar
I’m glad someone listened to me a couple years back. The first comment I ever made on Lemmy was on the original version of this, pointing out that Magnesium was DEFINITELY fine to lick.
If it’s got a nice oxide layer on the outside, fine. Otherwise it’s fairly reactive.
The oxide layer forms within seconds, like aluminium and sodium (the two elements surrounding it), and even if you scraped it off and stuck it on your tongue, it isn’t going to react quickly enough to do you any damage. It will probably taste slightly bitter, like licking baking soda. I have some downstairs. Shall I test it and take a video of the results?
The good version of this says “see you on the other side”.
If you find enough oganesson to lick, you should get to do it
How many licks to get to the center of a sodium lollipop
If you have enough saliva, just one…
how can something be ‘maybe not a good idea’ on a lickability scale but also be used as a medication?
Well, you saw that uranium is colored yellow so…
Yeah maybe mixing up medicines and giving 11 year old me iodine tincture to drink wasn’t the best move
😏 Are you a green element on the periodic table? Cause I wanna lick you
O₂ or O₃? How about isotopes?











