Make it so the first sub rule prohibits the use of any “Teslurs”.
Take anything critical of Tesla and either turn it into the most saccharine praise of Tesla or play directly into the Tesla owner exceptionality/victimhood complex, e.g.:
Even nature itself recognises how cool Teslas are. I don’t see any racoons trying to break into your F-150, Darren.
Watch the Tesla owners as they are baffled and slightly unnerved by the sub, unsure as to whether they’re part of a cargono-go cult or if the whole sub is collectively mocking them because the lines are too blurry to make out what’s actually going on in there.
Send Elon’s main account a moderator invite so he is definitely aware of the sub. Know that Elon Musk’s weird ageplay alt is a subscriber and that he seethes with rage knowing about the sub’s existence.
Please keep in mind that this is how TheDonald started.
For real? I never knew it started as satire.
Makes sense though. Reactionaries recuperate satire.
It was satire for approximately 12 hours before being flooded with true believers.
The Donald Glover fandom sub?
r/Teslabrokedownbutstilllovethecar
r/StillLoveTheCar is available
Shhhh no, don’t! You’re trying to tempt me into making a
account, aren’t you?This was your idea!
“People complain about Tesla reliability but I think of breakdowns as mandatory downtime maintenance which ultimately saves us on mileage, which only increases resale value. Think of how much better the environment would be if ICErs were as considerate of the environment as us Tesla drivers are!”
also yo I was gonna leave a comment saying loveforlandlords isn’t actually a satire subreddit but I didn’t realise it actually got taken over by leftists like a year ago o7
My first post would be
What’s with the woke moralists who are anti-NeuralLink?*
“This really shocks me. I’m of the belief that musk should convince Trump to subsidize chip implants as it would be a game changer when it comes to productivity and the overall economy. Those who do not get chipped would quickly realize their mistake as musk would
- usher us into a new future
- reserve his place as a rightful trillionaire
Imagine being in the same space as chatgpt and harnessing its power and energy to efficiently complete business-related tasks.
I can’t even comprehend what that would do to my portfolio. I think there’s also a good chance that I could get my divorced wife back. As someone with a BS in chemical engineering, I never expected her to leave a man such as myself with my salary of nearly 200K a year, but this would certainly be a game changer.
Edit: I sent Elon musk a link to this post on X and actually got a like!
Edit2: holeeeee shit guys he just tweeted about his ex in college who broke up with him for being a creep lol I think he read the post. Can someone who has access to mid journey please make an image of Elon musk serving a dish of consciousness with a bunch of screaming femoids in the background? I think he’d really get a kick out of it 😂
Just think of the benefits you could reap by always having access to your workplace by Neuralink!
That brilliant idea you have in the middle of the night? Straight into a document on your workplace computer, without even needing to turn on a light.
On holidays and you wanted to quickly check in on the progress of that big project? No worries, just tap into your work email account wirelessly while you enjoy the tropical beach as you relax!
Emergency in the office? You will now get an immediate notification, any hour of the day and any day of the week, so you can address the problem straight away instead of waiting until 9am Monday morning and being caught completely unawares!
Mark my words, this is the next big thing. The divide between the “haves” and the “have-nots” will be about who has a Neuralink implant. No employer will choose to hire a non-Neura over the coming Neuralink master race!
As a manager, it will be amazing to see when my employees have gone idle on teams. Instead of implementing a push notification to me, I’m going to see if there is an integration in the tesla store that allows you to send a message to their chip which warns them to get back to work.
Chips belong to my company from the hours of 9-5 which is a clause in the contract for security purposes, so I can’t emphasize enough how important this is for emphasizing one our core values of going above and beyond at all costs to ensure continued growth
There’s already an unironic one that bans anybody who’s ever posted in any of the subs critical of tesla, I saw it for the first time the other day when I saw they’re top post which was a meme saying I’d elons so dumb how come he’s rich?
You’re gonna have to get way way summer if you wanna differentiate yourselves from actual muskrats.
Bolster it by making a subrdt for Chevrusaders.
Deus Volt!
