It began a few years ago. I’ve always been a light sleeper, and turning on the light, even more a moment, seriously disrupts my sleep. This problem seems to be getting worse with age. I could literally wake up at 2am and not fall back asleep for the entire night. I really tried to pee standing up with the light off, like use passive sonar and aim via sound. I tried keeping the stream where the sound is splashy, but my hit rate was 50%, which is clearly unacceptable. So one night I’m like fuck it I’m gonna pee like my gf, and I never went back.
It evolved to just laziness. Aiming takes concentration, sitting is peaceful. And no matter how much I try, when doing a standing pee, there is often a spot or two I need to wipe up later. Or even worse, I don’t notice the spot until the next day 😭.
I might continue to pee standing up, as normal, when in public toilets, as I can’t trust strangers to not get the seat dirty.
Pic unrelated. I don’t know what the Germans are doing.
Pissing sitting down is vastly superior in almost every way imaginable. Pissing standing up is gross and just splashes piss everywhere, even if you can’t see it. Anyone who disagrees with me is wrong. I know a lot of dick-pissers who for some think sitting down to piss is “weird”. ok pissboy enjoy living in piss because you’re too big and strong and manly to sit down to pee pee.
This is why going into the back yard and pissing off the porch is the best.
Get the convenance of standing up, without any worries about aiming, or splashing piss, cause it all goes into the grass.
It also reminds the dog that the yard is MINE.
does make for awkward conversations with my sons preschool teacher tho.
protip: you can avoid piss splatter when peeing standing up if you keep your pants on while you do it
I pee sitting down, but poo standing up
I mean I knew it wasn’t exactly common, but I didn’t realize how weird some people found it until today when my friend came over to my apartment and asked why there was a chair in front of the toilet. He looked at me like I belonged in an insane asylum. Is it really that weird?
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I’ve always peed sitting down, at least outside of public toilets; it’s weird to me that this is not the default, it’s so much easier
i only pee standing up so i can look down upon the toilet and it knows we are not equals.
I was in a public toilet one time with godlessworm. They just maintained a confident eye contact the entire time. As that wasn’t enough, they grabbed my shoulders, pulled their mouth to my ear, and whispered “beta”.
Piss got all over the floor, tho.
this is backwards, the toilet doesnt need you but you need the toilet. the toilet indeed knows you’re not equals. it is better than you and holds your fate in the palm of its hand.
the old master/slave dialectic. i make sure the toilet knows i could be pissing or shitting anywhere and CHOOSE to bless the toilet with my waste rather than using for example, a litter box or a bottle.
i put the cat’s litter box right next to the toilet so the toilet knows how good it has it.
I mostly pee sitting down now. I’m old and it’s easier. Plus I put my back out badly this weekend by nothing more than sitting on short plastic stools to watch bands and the women’s Euro’s final in a big tent.
my back hurts thinking about it
larry david taught me to sitpiss at night with an episode of curb. iirc his father in law puts the seat up and larry doesnt notice at night and falls in. idk why in his massive house he and his father and law were sharing a bathroom now that i think about it. anyway its a good idea
Yeah, I read theory
I started sitting a while ago but every so often I’ll do a standing one for te satisfying noise
Is this dialectics?
I forget what i said but yeah probably
Since hrt related shrinkage I have to use a hand to aim sitting down or else I pee in the gap between the seat and bowl
I go through cycles of sitting cause it’s chill vs standing if I’m in a work flow or feel like being loud
Both good
Oh I feel a bit bad for your gf who has had to sit in that and worst case scenario, put the ring down after all the splash or wash that toilet. They get so nasty when there are standing pee’ers around.
It took my partner a few dedaces to come to that same conclusion, he had all sorts of bs excuses for not sitting down like his bits supposedly hitting the bowl (definitely not buying that) and his bladder not emptying properly sitting down. We had the discussion of whether his bladder empties when he pees when taking a shit sitting down more times than I care to count. I told him how the toilet gets just nasty due to the standing and how it tends to be me who washes it as he apparently doesn’t really notice how dirty it is. Makes sense as he sat on it less. Moral of the story to anyone reading this rant, don’t be like him about this.
All the people who pee sitting down are instantly better partners is my take.
I always lift the lid before stand peeing, and nearly always wipe if I make a stray pee. But ya it’s not perfect.
“Passive sonar” had me giggling so hard
I have a night light. (Also I do all the bathroom cleaning)
![Out of laziness, I've starting peeing sitting down [cartoon image of male genitals]](https://hexbear.net/pictrs/image/567b0e5d-92c4-4200-ac8d-3702f721fd0e.webp){kind=link}