SEDGWICK COUNTY, Colo. - A naked Arizona man was arrested in Colorado after allegedly breaking into a locomotive, riding on top of the moving train and flashing unsuspecting onlookers while blasting the horn.
What we know:
Daniel Ray Ballance of Quartzsite was taken into custody by the Sedgwick County Sheriff’s Office following a bizarre sequence of events along the Union Pacific Railroad line. Authorities said Ballance boarded the train by smashing one of the locomotive’s windows to gain entry before climbing onto the roof.
Deputies were alerted to the situation after multiple witnesses reported seeing a completely nude man surfing on top of the moving train. While riding the locomotive through the county, Ballance reportedly blew the train’s horn to attract attention and exposed himself to residents watching the high-speed spectacle.
Dig deeper:
Following his arrest, deputies noted that Ballance openly expressed his fondness for “vodka, beer and playing the banjo.” He was booked into the local jail on a combination of felony and misdemeanor charges related to the train break-in and public exposure.
What’s next:
Ballance remains in custody awaiting his initial court appearance.
At this point we need c/dudesrock as a comm.
Maybe a counterpart of c/herhatedhobby too.
Daniel Ray Ballance of Quartzsite was taken into custody
a completely nude man surfing on top of the moving train
Nominative determinism strikes again
dudes rock
Forbid a man has hobbies.
Dudes no longer allowed to rock
Right? I thought this was America.
Dig deeper: Following his arrest, deputies noted that Ballance openly expressed his fondness for “vodka, beer and playing the banjo.” He was booked into the local jail on a combination of felony and misdemeanor charges related to the train break-in and public exposure.
A man of simple pleasures I see.
Whiskey’s too rough, champagne costs too much
And vodka puts my mouth in gear [perhaps not a bad thing though] /
Hobos do exist.
Other interests he listed was The Big Rock Candy Mountains and Beans
I’m not a stabbin’ hobo; I’m a singin’ hobo!
🪕🪕🪕🪕🪕
nothing beats the hobo life stabbing folks with my ho-bo-kniiiife
“vodka, beer and playing the banjo.”
That confirms it, this dude is clearly one of the few Crust Punk dudes who actually sticked with the lifestyle after 30. They’re a rare breed these days, most drop out at around 27 to get a job at their dad’s car dealership. DUDES ROCK!
(to unjerk here a bit, FYI, train hopping is like EXTREMELY DANGEROUS, while not one myself I used to hang with a lot of crusty types and man I’ve heard some horror stories about people getting their legs ripped off or nearly dying of diesel fume inhalation in tunnels. If you wanna be like a hobo punk type go for it but stick to hitchhiking, a random stranger’s car is safer than jumping on a train)
Wait, USA has trains?
Only for oil tankers and hobo surfers
blasting the horn is the new jorkin it
Oh shit, that’s a crime? In Colorado?
One evening as the sun went down
And the jungle fire was burning
Down the track came a hobo hiking
And he said, “Boys, I’m not turning”
I’m headed for a land that’s far away
Besides the crystal fountains
So come with me, we’ll go and see
The big rock candy mountain"
Does he have a YouTube channel?
I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:
Comedy will be legal again!
