jenny always has banger tweets
A movie studio CEO and Jared chat on the phone.
“Sorry to call so late, Jared.”
“Yeah. What time is it?”
“2 am.”
“What now?”
“I’m horny.”
Sighs. “I don’t know if I can do the sex thing.”
“Why!”
“I did it at 1 am.”
“With who?”
He ignores the question. “Did you bump my comp for the movie or nah?”
“It’s a delicate process there are many—”
“Yeah or nah?”
“Not yet.”
“Do that. And you can call me before midnight tomorrow.” And he hangs up.
“Fuck!” - he says to himself. He wants the contracts to be ready when he gets to the office. He starts by going to his enormous closet to find the just the right shirt for an emergency zoom call he’s gonna do commando at 3 am with some lawyers and some other assholes.
Maybe Letos cult has more reach than we assumed ?
we need a
He’s fine as an antagonist imo. Still shouldn’t be in any movie though.
He was fine as a soulless, sociopathic CEO of a corporation that deals in humanoid slavery in Bladerunner 2048
hes not the lead in this one, so it actually has a chance of success
IT JUST KEEPS HAPPENING (DEROGATORY)
What’s the funniest 80s thing with really annoying fans that can have a sequel or reboot starring Jared Leto?
GO BOTS. the transformers knock off that clueless parents pulled out if the bargain bin at Kmart. (animated, Leto does all the voices)
CAPTAIN POWER AND THE SOLDIERS OF THE FUTURE. GI Joes, but future post-apocalyptic earth where “man fought machines, and machines won.” Leto plays dual roles (Captain Jonathan Power and Lord Dread)
MACGUYVER. Leto plays the eponymous cia-funded physicist infiltrator. or the antagonist Murdoch. or both.
richard dean anderson should kill jared leto in real life
He should be Dr. Jonathan Chase in the Manimal reboot
Let’s see how good of an actor he is when he has to pretend to turn into a falcon or a leopard
CAPTAIN POWER AND THE SOLDIERS OF THE FUTURE. GI Joes, but future post-apocalyptic earth where “man fought machines, and machines won.” Leto plays dual roles (Captain Jonathan Power and Lord Dread)
Hello fellow old
I can just imagine them re-releasing the merch with the light-up peg that plugs into a translucent hole through the
doll’saction figure’s chestMACGUYVER. Leto plays the eponymous cia-funded physicist infiltrator. or the antagonist Murdoch. or both.
It can’t be any worse than the reboot.
Rambo. Have jared leto try to be rambo and watch. The image of the military will never recover from the fuckery that follows.
he can be the next Freddy Kreuger. shouldn’t be hard for him to play a child predator
Would fit in with his “being a weird creep and calling it method acting” lol
Slimer in the umpteenth Ghost Busters reboot
American Psycho prequel starring AI de-aged Leto.
Back to the Future?
If a live action skeletor doesn’t make you want to fuck him it’s not hitting the right vibe.
It’s Skeletorbin’ time!
This movie is gona make a morbillion dollars
Fuck that. A skeletrillion dollars
This movie better not have women or minorities in it or their will be hell to pay.
There’s a black woman who plays this HR boss. In the trailer, we see her chastising the protagonist for his obsession with “nerd stuff” not fitting the “image of HR.” This is right after a close up of the name plate on his desk, which has “he/him” under his name. So, yeah, a bit concerned this is gonna be chud-bait.
Jared Leto as Skeletor: “I am Death Destroyer of Worlds! And Box Office Poison!”
“Cut!” And then “Jared - we talked about this. And more than once too. No improvising. Read the line as written.”
“But I need to speak my truth.”
so the movie is gonna bomb.
oh wait, he’s not the lead actor. so it has a chance.
also why the fuck does it have to be “He-Man was on earth and now we took a spaceship to the other world.” is that was this was? im too young to care for this franchise.
every trailer at some point: beeeewwwwwwwwww
Originally He-Man’s mom was an astronaut from Earth who got lost on a mission, and John Carter of Mars’d her way in and married the king of Eternia, and as a kid I was always pissed they never showed that much cooler sounding story than the bullshit the show was actually about
From what i can tell on wiki, the He-Mans mom part was created in the DC Comics. which i guess was separate from the show?
Those of us that are old enough to remember this franchise are asking: “My third colonoscopy is in the rear view mirror, who the fuck is this for?”
Whats his method acting gonna be for this one? Grave robbery? Playing ‘bad to the bone’ on repeat?
One the day I was born.
guitar riff
At the age of four.
guitar riff
My mama asked me a question
guitar riff
What the fuck are those?
I make a rich woman barf
guitar riff
I’ll make a good woman twinge
guitar riff
I’ll make an old woman heave
guitar riff
And make society cringe
Political views, scandals, and general douchebaggery aside, why? The guy’s a terrible actor
His best role was in Tron: Ares because they didn’t let him act, and he was still bad lmao
I liked him in American Psycho, really, but that might be because it was such a small part, and also he got rather murdered
Everything he’s been in has been hated (or at least his roles in them have been hated); I legit have no idea how he still keeps getting roles
No way he’s doing that iconic nasal voice, it’s just gonna be a weird skull man trying to sound bad ass
Jared doesnt do voices, and he doesnt cut his hair. Im certain thats in all his contracts.
Also it’s probably going to turn out he’s wearing a mask or helmet, and there’s probably going to be a scene where he takes it off to have a personal chat with He-man where he tries to talk about how Eternia betrayed him and tries to get He-man on his side
CALLING IT NOW! THEY’RE DOING THIS TROPE!
It’s gonna be a mask he takes off for over half the film.
Ever since Dallas Buyers Club, Hollywood has been giving Jared Leto a free pass.
ninja edit. Leto can act but he needs to be kept away from “genre” films. That’s it. That’s the post.
