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HarryLime [any]@hexbear.net to chapotraphouse@hexbear.netEnglish · 1年前

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HarryLime [any]@hexbear.net to chapotraphouse@hexbear.netEnglish · 1年前
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  • GrouchyGrouse [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    1年前

    Real men only drink the meat juice they spoon out of the bottom of the pack of raw hamburger because they think it’s blood.

    Real men are also 32% intestinal parasite by volume, as nature intended.

    • PorkrollPosadist [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.netM
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      1年前

      Grabbing a pound of ground beef from a mildewy 7-Eleven refrigerator and sucking it out of a Big Slurpee cup through a straw.

      • CyberSyndicalist [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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        1年前

        libs-owned

        • SkingradGuard [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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          1年前

          Holy shit lmao

    • Findom_DeLuise [she/her, they/them]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      geordi-no Myoglobin

      geordi-yes Ouroglobin

    • Owl [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      visible-disgust

  • sir_this_is_a_wendys@hexbear.net
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    1年前

    deleted by creator

    • SpiderFarmer [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      Me, but because I garden.

      • sir_this_is_a_wendys@hexbear.net
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        1年前

        deleted by creator

        • SpiderFarmer [he/him]@hexbear.net
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          1年前

          Damn. I couldn’t push back on that one cause I’m basically pansexual.

  • PorkrollPosadist [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.netM
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    1年前

    Real alpha males can have a little citric acid, as a treat

  • NewAcctWhoDis [any]@hexbear.net
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    1年前

    Isn’t having your wife bring you a glass of lemonade after you mow the lawn a classic RETVRN fantasy?

    • WhatDoYouMeanPodcast [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      I was writing an essay about the difference between Andrew Tate, female dating strategy, and the RETVRN types, but I started to think about how all of them have a bunch of prescriptions for what men consoom, how they emote, and how they engage with society. I think the difference in opinion on what men consoom is negligible between the different subfactions.

      I don’t think a leftist movement has a good alternative to offer a disaffected politically agnostic young man who wants a relationship besides the opportunity to cleanly disengage with people who are demanding they stop drinking lemonade, but you didn’t really ask that. Perhaps in that case, when a RETVRN type is trying to tell men that in their utopia women will step back in line and be obedient, it’s just important to always be ready to tell people that fascism has always been obsessed with aesthetics and it never sits flush with reality so while we don’t have a good answer, it’s better than an actively harmful answer that brings you further from what you want.

    • AssortedBiscuits [they/them]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      It’s one of those things where you have to be offered something but have to refuse it because reasons.

    • shitholeislander [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      deleted by creator

    • shitholeislander [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      deleted by creator

  • SorosFootSoldier [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
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    1年前

    Hot babe comes out with a pitcher of lemonade while I’m wiping the sweat off my brow from mowing the lawn: No thanks “sweetheart” lemonade is for WOMEN.

  • ChaosMaterialist [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    1年前

    Oh great! What am I supposed to make with all these lemons life is giving me?!

    • Gamer_time [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      Rub em’ in the wounds of your enemies! Raaaaaaaaah!!! barbarian

      • ChaosMaterialist [he/him]@hexbear.net
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        1年前

        How could I forget Cave Johnson and his excellent lemon advice!

    • GalaxyBrain [they/them]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      Somehow at work, lemon in various form has made it’s way all over the menu and so I’ve genuinely got some solutions to your joke problem! Zest it and nix the zest with a bunch of salt and sugar, mix regularly while drying and you got like a sweet lemony salt thats good sprinkled on lots of stuff, slice the peels up thin and long and simmer them in oil and you got lemon conditioner, and the lemon oil can be used to make a solid lemon aioli, you can make a pretty dope dressing with 1/3 lemon juice 2/3 olive oil and a bunch of salt and pepper mixed up, and you can just eat a lemon.

      • ChaosMaterialist [he/him]@hexbear.net
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        1年前

        Bookmarked for later because all that sounds de-licious!

        • GalaxyBrain [they/them]@hexbear.net
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          1年前

          Lemme know if you want some further details on anything or pretty much any food question. Been a pro for like 12 years and know my way around just about anything edible.

    • TraschcanOfIdeology [they/them, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      Make preserved lemons and add them to delicious dishes.

  • supafuzz [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    1年前

    please somebody tell me what list of approved manly drinks is

    • SorosFootSoldier [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      1.) BEER

      2.) Whisky

      3.) Liquid death

      4.) Raw milk

      5.) Room temperature water

      • AmaryllisBlues [she/her]@hexbear.net
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        1年前

        Fuck that water shit. REAL men drink mountain dewwwwwwwwwwww

      • supafuzz [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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        1年前

        4.) Raw milk

        what, like a baby cow?

        • GaveUp [she/her]@hexbear.net
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          1年前

          No, from your tradwife duh

      • Nationalgoatism [any]@hexbear.net
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        1年前

        As a man, you should only drink whiskey, never whisky which is a liquor for effeminate peoples (scots etc)

        • supafuzz [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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          1年前

          Oh no, in Colombia we only have kilt-wearing girl whisky kitty-cri-screm

          • supafuzz [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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            1年前

            is rum manly? we have rum

            pirates drank rum

            • TheDoctor [they/them]@hexbear.net
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              1年前

              Pirates were gay as fuck

              • supafuzz [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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                1年前

                oh shit oh damn :ohnoes:

            • emizeko [they/them]@hexbear.net
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              1年前

              “Come in, Jim,” said the captain. “You’re a good boy in your line, Jim, but I don’t think you and me’ll go to sea again. You’re too much of the born favourite for me. Is that you, John Silver? What brings you here, man?”
              “Come back in my booty, sir,” returned Silver. “Ah!” said the captain, and that was all he said. What a supper I had of it that night, with all my friends around me; and what a meal it was, with Ben Gunn’s salted goat and some delicacies and a bottle of old wine from the HISPANIOLA. Never, I am sure, were people gayer or happier.

      • buh [she/her, any]@hexbear.net
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        1年前
        1. The juice from RAW chicken because REAL MEN aren’t afraid of bird flu
  • betelgeuse [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    1年前

    Yes, I’m a man. That means I drain my styrofoam tray of raw chicken into a glass and add some spritz for a manly sparkling myoglobin.

    • Yamimakai [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      Now why would a man want a sparkling drink?

      You know what else sparkles? Glitter. No real man would be caught dead in the same room as glitter.

  • sir_this_is_a_wendys@hexbear.net
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    1年前

    deleted by creator

    • SnowySkyes [she/her]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      I just finished drinking lemonade and I lost mine. Taking this highly scientific study into consideration, people have a 50% chance to lose their penis if they drink lemonade.

      • Xx_Aru_xX [she/her, they/them]@hexbear.net
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        1年前

        Aggressively drinking Lemonade

      • sir_this_is_a_wendys@hexbear.net
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        deleted by creator

    • jaywalker [they/them, any]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      I STILL have a penis

      what are you gay???

    • da_gay_pussy_eatah [she/her]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      If anything changes lmk

      • sir_this_is_a_wendys@hexbear.net
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        1年前

        deleted by creator

    • Pentacat [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      Put some fruit in it.

      • comrade_pibb [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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        1年前

        I’m literally drinking lemonade right now and I STILL have a penis with some fruit in it

      • sir_this_is_a_wendys@hexbear.net
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        deleted by creator

  • CloutAtlas [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    1年前

    Honestly trying American lemonade and American tea for the first time was an experience. Why is there so much sugar (or I guess high fructose corn syrup) in this drink?

    • Dessa [she/her]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      Depends on who is making it. Everything store bought will be super sweet. I make my lemonade sour

      • CloutAtlas [he/him]@hexbear.net
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        1年前

        It was an immigrant from Chicago, but she said she preferred “southern style” whatever that means. Pulled out iced tea with like a week’s worth of my regular sugar intake in the pitcher.

        • frankfurt_schoolgirl [she/her]@hexbear.net
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          1年前

          Southern tea is absurdly sweet, it’s more normal in other places. I did think lemonade was sugary everywhere tho.

          • invalidusernamelol [he/him]@hexbear.net
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            1年前

            Southern sweet tea is more of a dessert. Basically everyone here orders unsweet though and adds sugar to taste. The sweet tea they sell is mostly for kids and old ladies.

    • Awoo [she/her]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      sugar (or I guess high fructose corn syrup)

      IT ALL TASTES LIKE METAL AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

      Thank god we don’t have this problem in the UK

  • ta00000 [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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    1年前

    warf-wtf a warrior’s drink

  • GalaxyBrain [they/them]@hexbear.net
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    1年前

    I miss working at a place that was also a juice bar, I figured out an amazing recipe for close enough to lemonade. Lemons mostly, a couple basil leaves and a bit of carrot juiced. Pour it over shaved ice. Best cooking in a hot kitchen drink ever if they also throw in some vodka

  • AlicePraxis [any]@hexbear.net
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    1年前

    when life gives you lemons, take a shot of whiskey like a REAL MAN

  • Feinsteins_Ghost [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    1年前

    why are you …

    Because it’s delicious thats why. Imagine having such a fragile grip on being a man, whatver the fuck that even means, that you are bothered by a man drinking lemonade.

  • anarchoilluminati [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    1年前

    Limeaid supremacy.

    • comrade_pibb [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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      1年前

      hell yeah

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