i hope he dies and they do an even dumber version of the queen’s funeral where 150,000 round chuds line up to touch the casket
Dana White doing 47 push up at his wake
Honestly amazed it’s not 88
Removed by mod
Instead of the 21 gun salute, it’s just Rogan, White and Hegseth doing push ups.
Dana will go GOOFCON 1 doing that many push ups, a previously unobservable shade of red will be revealed
At cemetery there’s a 47-volley salute. And 47 fighter planes fly overhead followed by 47 bombers. After that…
It goes on and on and on. The priest was only told there was “going to be delay”. Fox News’s GOODBYE TO THE GREATEST PRESIDENT EVER panel see the priest fidgeting. Then his body language shows him to be annoyed. He even checks his watch. The panel is outraged. They repeatedly say his name, his church’s name, and what city he lives in. Chuds quickly totally dox him. When the service is over - the priest checks his phone and then his email. He has 1,000s of death threats. He calls his wife. She’s prettified. People have knocked on the door. And they were milling around the house. Then somebody threw a brick into a window.
The next day the priest has a sort of press conference outside his home. His wife and children are there. He says “I truly loved strong and powerful president Trump. I cannot express how disappointed I am in my—” He is then shoot 44 times in a row by Mike J. Chud who says “I did it for the honor of President Trump. I lost count. I’m sorry I lost count. Hard to count 'cause I was shooting so much and reloading.” He is not prosecuted. In fact - the investigation soon ends due to “gross errors in evidence collection”. Mr. Chud aka “Hero Chud” eventually becomes a notable politician in his own right even though he was repeatedly convicted for CSAM and he speaks and reads at a third grade level.
They’ll have to have heavily armed federal agents along the entire route so their isn’t utter chaos as the chuds rush his GOLDEN HERSE LIMO to get at the coffin and open it to touch the HOLY body of their Messiah.
Can he just fucking die already
Edit: Biden too please
He won’t die until the worst/best moment. It’ll be the middle of Jan 6 part 2 & he’ll keel over for completely different reasons (choking on a Big Mac while ordering the storming of the capitol a second time). MAGAs will blame this on Dems/woke/immigrants/scapegoat and launch a crusade in his name with Barron at the head. His skull will be entombed in the Trump MonumentBe the change you want to see in the world ☺️ lmfao
A second bruise has hit the president
Please let him die in office I desperately want to see what it does to people’s brains
tired trump bruises easily like an overripe fruit
Ahem.
A STRONG AND POWERFUL FRUIT LIKE… UM… A PINEAPPLE?
A Jackfruit
Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here, and see my hands; and put out your hand, and place it in my side. Do not disbelieve, but believe.”
He’s dying
Or Barron is secretly beating him up
In the White House basement MMA cage they meet again.
“Barron, I don’t wanna fight anymore.”
Barron is now 7’ 3". He grew another inch just yesterday. “Put your hands up. Protect yourself at all times.”
“But I don’t wanna.”
Barron knees him in the liver - easy as you please. And the president goes down like sack of potatoes. Barron raises his fists. “I win again!” he shouts.
“Arrrrgggh” says the president in a fetal ball.
Enjoy some Hexbear gold for your great post
There is always hope.
We need our top folks on how to get Liz Truss into the White House
Chuds don’t even know her name. But if she shows up and then Trump dies - she better run and hide. And fast too. They will want to… um… meet her.
look at lizzie’s hand
LOOK AT IT
DEPLOY AGENT TRUSS
On the day it finally happens, the turmoil it brings is going to be completely unprecedented
the value of my rare Vance collection will go through the ROOF
btw if you right-click on this I will sue your ass off
unprecedented
There’s a president joke here somewhere but everything in my head sounds like the voice of a lib.
Unpresidented
I could hear a Mormon Tabernacle Choir-like chorus of r/politics denizens turning that single word into a Dem Holy song
Didn’t Trump pronounce or type it that way once?
Please just let us have one nice thing
This happens a lot with the elderly, they lose feeling in their hands and are more unsteady on their feet, so they bump into things harder, and their body in turn heals slower than it used to, so a bruise that would normally go away in a day or two will stay there for weeks. Don’t know about the one that has been there for months though, that sounds like a legitimate medical problem.
this story demeans OP, everyone who upvotes it and everyone who comments
Who’s roughing him up
My take - https://hexbear.net/comment/6442230
༼ つ ^ _ ^ ༽つ
I’d rather he’d have gone out like Stan. But this’ll do, pig. This’ll do.
