Saint Hallvard, patron of Oslo and innocence, died trying to help an enslaved pregnant woman – a complete stranger to himself – escape from three men who had accused her of stealing. Though both Hallvard and the woman were ultimately killed by the three men’s arrows, Hallvard’s body refused to sink in the fjord even with the heavy millstone put around his neck by his killers, and as a result the men who killed Hallvard and the woman were found out.
Saint Anthony is the patron Saint of being so fed up with people not listening to you, you rather go talk to the fishes instead (that’s literally his story).
shark is so over it lmao
I think St George is officially the patron saint of your team losing a game of football (soccer) then punching your wife.
st. brigid was originally a pagan goddess and the church retconned an abbess so they could declare victory in having converted all the brigid worshippers
sometimes your like 90% done and you just need to get across the finish line, I relate
My mom used to pray to Saint Jude, who’s known as the saint of lost causes. Also in a kind of sad twist of fate, a major children’s hospital is named after him.
the hospital is a bit on the nose wow
Yeah kind of an odd name, pretty sure St. Jude’s hospital is the best in the country? Not sure, I see commercials for them all the time.
Commercials for a hospital
what
It’s for donations, I should have said that!
St Nick is the patron saint of buying red and green shit and hating your family
And dropping money down random women’s chimneys. And calling out street vendors for cannibalism.
In Porto, there is a celebration of St John the Baptist where everyone goes around with rubber hammers and hits each other on the head all night long.
St. Sebastian.
He’s a patron saint of the persecuted, athletics and archery. He’s also popular among LGBT men since he’s usually depicted as a half-naked twunk…but there’s also the tragedy in him being violently persecuted for who he is to be very relatable.
St Nick, the patron saint of buying red and green shit and having sex and throwing up
st. jimmy is the patron saint of vandalizing a 7-eleven bathroom and fighting in the parking lot
patron saint of dudes rocking
the failson of rage and love 😡❤️
St. Dismas is recognized as the patron saint of prisoners, thieves, funeral directors, and those seeking redemption. His Feast Day is observed on March 25.
Saint Dismas (also spelled Dimas, Dysmas, or Demas) is traditionally known as the “Good Thief” or “Penitent Thief” who was crucified alongside Jesus Christ on Golgotha. Jesus was crucified between two criminals (often called thieves or, in some interpretations, revolutionaries).
San Dimas High School Football Rules!
St. Christopher is the patron Saint of being (stuck in) traffic.
Countless catholic car drivers have his little picture on the mirror, but really he was just some giant dude who helped a kid across a stream in the 3rd century. As it happens, it later turned out that was baby Jesus.
That is not a safe way to carry an infant
baby Jesus
3rd century
Ummmm
Don’t tell the Vatican. They’d be so embarrassed.
St Elmo is the patron Saint of setting shit on fire
patron saint of self indulgent coming of age dramadies
St Barbara is the patron saint of artillery men because she’s the saint for not blowning your ass up.
St Vincent Ferrer, the patron saint of plumbers/boilermakers.
