Harry Houdini, Angus MacGyver, and James Randi
I think all of them are dead, I’m not sure I will be safe with a bunch of dead people in the elevator
Richard Dean Anderson/MacGyver/General O’Neil is alive.
Don’t scare me like that!
Three guys wearing a red shirt
three clones of tom scott, who say “we are standing in an elevator going to the 5th floor” in perfect unison as you enter
Honestly if I was a woman any dude in life. Maybe even those goth dudes on black horses. Def the trees tho. They Hott af
My two older brothers and my dad
Figures that the safest men to be stuck with aren’t human men.
Aragorn?
He’s 87 years old at the start of LOTR.
He descends from Elros the Half-Elf.He’s got Elven heritage. He’s the 64th descendant of Elros, brother of Elrond. I think he’s also decendend from a Maiar as Elros and Elrond’s great great grandmother was Melian.
I tried to come up with a counter argument and realized pretty quickly that I didn’t want to.
What’s the counter-argument ? Let’s hear it
I mean, they’re objectively correct.
Not if yer a fucken orc!
The fact that they had to go to fictional characters is significant.
The people you know well enough to trust them are close to you but unknown to others, so other people wouldn’t really appreciate your unswer if it was just some common unknown people. You mostly cannot bet on the character of celebrities, because you don’t know them personally (see Gaiman). Fictional characters are known by many people and their personalities are nicely described in the books, movies, whatever…
it really isn’t, people comfortably stand in elevators with men all the time lol
To be fair, being fictional means they’re significantly less dimensional than real people and are incapable of holding secrets.
I mean there are real people I feel absolutely safe around, but they’re just normal people I know and have built trust with. There are no famous people I can say the same for because I don’t know them personally, even if they seem good on the surface. And for fictional characters like these, we “know” Aragorn is safe because he’s written to be benevolent, we’ve read his entire life, and the author’s dead so there’s no possibility for new material to change that perception.
LotR should have started becoming public domain in America in 2023 btw
We’re in the LOTR community, the sample may be a little biased
Yes, but the person who responded to the question wasn’t in a LOTR community.
All the other people who answered weren’t posted here
I know, I’m just referring to this particular person’s response.
Good point!
Okay, real world examples from me (notably, a big dude, so y’know, probably not as in tune to things as I could be):
Bernie Sanders My brother My Uncle
… I… Really thought I’d have better options until I really started thinking about it
Yeah. Same issue here. So how about:
Bob Ross. Carl Sagan. Steve Irwin.
I’d swap Steve for Bernie.
Not because I think Steve would hurt anyone directly. But at any moment he may be like “would you like to see this deadly spider I’ve got in m’pocket?” And then pull out a spider that even spider scientists didn’t know existed or some shit. He would never let the spider hurt you, but you’d have a heart attack anyway.
I think he’d respect the spider enough not to keep it in a pocket. Though Bernie seems popular in the comments too.
also that 2 of them aren’t men
I would take “men” to just mean “male people,” since it’s not being asked in the context of a fantasy world.
I’d choose: Boromir, Ned Stark, and Sean Bean.
No way anything bad can happen to me with those magnets around.
I dunno. Might take Sharpe instead of Ned Stark, good to have someone that knows how to use a rifle
The whole elevator would just crash through the foundation. You’d be collateral when Death gets a 3 for 1 final destination style.
Nah, I think it’d go more like this:
- Get it in the elevator and see them all in there.
- Go to press the button for your floor (the top floor) and see that it’s already pressed.
- Have a pleasant trip up.
- Arrive at your floor and the doors open.
- All three politely allow you to exit first.
- Step out of the lift safely.
- Elevator malfunctions, plummets and crashes through the foundation.
- Walk off thinking how nice they all were.
Is the elevator spacious?
Ok I recognise Andre and Arnold, who’s the dude on the left?
Wilt Chamberlain.
The only NBA player to individually score 100 points in a game.
I can’t believe how jacked Arnold is here. It’s truly remarkable.
Thats not even his peak, he was more jacked as Hercules and in the first Terminator film imo, before his movie career.
Arnold’s got a decent number of allegations against him, but Andre would protect you so I guess it’s honestly a freebie for the other two if he’s in the mix.
Everywhere they went people were getting kidnapped, orcs were invading, trees were coming to life, and the dead were rising. Id want to be far away from that elevator.
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You take that back, I protect my marines while playing!
You know… As much as possible while charging headfirst into the most powerful empire the galaxy has seen in 100,000 years hell bent on destroying humanity and all we represent…
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Look bro, I just handed you an entire SPNKR rocket launcher and a Scorpion jump seat, whatever you do with those afterward is no longer my concern. I’m busy driving.
You know for a fact that they’ll literally coming charging across the countryside to rescue you though
Not much countryside for the charging in most elevators, though 🤔
They probably wouldn’t be that familiar with the workings of a lift either
Only one of them.
But Legolas could poke out the ceiling panel with the tip of his bow and Aragorn could boost Gimli up with a rope.
So ackshually…
Aragorn was descended from Elros who was a half-elf, but that was so long ago he may or may not be a full man depending on how racist one is about miscegenation.
Legolas was an elf and Gimli was a dwarf, so explicitly not Men.
How about Eomer and Faramir instead?
Elros and Elrond had a choice as to become Eldar or Edain. Elrond chose Eldar, while Elros chose Edain. Once they chose their mixed nature was resolved.
Not exactly, since the Númenóreans still had longer lives than Men due to their elven heritage. So while one could absolutely make the argument they were Men, there’s also a case to be made saying they weren’t pureblooded Men.
one drop
Boromir would’ve made them feel safer.
Faramir didn’t try to take the Ring from Frodo, unlike Boromir.
Boromir literally picked the ring up and handed it back to Frodo. He was tested and passed.
The Fellowship broke apart because Boromir tried to take the Ring from Frodo at Amon Hen and Frodo used it to disappear and run from him.
Men as in males, yes.
Men as in humans, mostly no
Somewhat related: that’s a dream blunt rotation right there
I feel like Gimli would hog it, Aragorn would obviously be awesome, and Legolas would be chill but you could tell he’s thinking your weed sucks, he’s got a much better connection.
i like to imagine that weed is the opposite of beer when it comes to elves and dwarves, elves barely even notice while dwarves start giggling when standing next to someone puffing a blunt
Oh and hobbits would of course treat it like something abjectly holy, they already take pipeweed extremely seriously and that’s just tobacco. Actual devil’s lettuce might well start hobbit cults.
Gimli, it’s a blunt, not a microphone
Let’s be real. We’re all NPCs so if any of the men are from something with action, we’ll probably end up dead. My pick would be Bob Ross, Mr. Rogers, and Steve Irwin. Super calming and chill
Steve was an amazing person but I wouldn’t describe him as chill.
He was pure overwhelming enthusiastic energy.
Fair point. Well, he’ll balance out the other two then. It’ll be like drugs (I assume), two downers and one upper
I never imagined I’d ever see someone compare Mr. Rogers to drugs, but here we are.
“Speed into one nostril, coke into the other”-energy
I don’t know; can you name three bears that women would feel safer with?
bear in the big blue house is one, for sure. he wouldn’t even need violence to stave off nasty people, he’d just make them feel bad.
Barenstain?